Sunday, August 22, 2010

Giada De Laurentiis

So, as you all know, I am big fan of the Foot Network. If I am not watching ESPN, or the NFL Network, I am watching the Food Network or the Cooking Channel. That's how it goes at my place.

As you all know, Giada De Laurentiis is the reigning Diva of the Food Network. With all due respect to Alton Brown, she is probably the most popular figure the network has ever had. If you walk into any Target, you cannot go past the cooking gear or the groceries without seeing her face at least 20 times. Here is just partial list of some of the things I have seen with her face and logo it.
  1. Giada De Laurentiis Pasta
  2. Giada De Laurentiis Pasta Sauce
  3. Giada De Laurentiis Cookware
  4. Giada De Laurentiis Cutlery
  5. Giada De Laurentiis Cutting boards
  6. Giada De Laurentiis Utensils
  7. Giada De Laurentiis Cookbooks
  8. Giada De Laurentiis Table sets
So forth and so on. Amazing... Giada has conquered the world. Not only this, but my buddy Colin is head-over-heals in love with her. I mean bat-shit crazy in love. He has been for several years now. It is just one of those crushes that just won't go away. He is a Cancer guy, and his Taurus wife really doesn't cook. Now you know the rest of the story. Do you remember what the Star Goddess had to say about this subject?

The funny thing is that I never knew Giada back in college. Neither did Colin. Why is that a strange thing? Giada happens to have a B.A. degree from UCLA in Social Anthropology. The date stamped on her diploma is 1996. The funny thing is that I happen to have a B.A. degree from UCLA in Anthropology 1995, although my focus was more biological. I was one year ahead of her.

I find it particularly strange that I never met Giada because Dr. Anna Simons sat on my B.A. Honors thesis committee. I was in her office regularly. What does Anna Simons have to do with this question? She was the reigning social anthropologist in our rather small department. Anna held the seat in Social Anthropology. Giada must have worked with Anna. I am surprised we never bumped into each other... at least I never noticed her. I think I would have noticed her.

Colin has chastised me several times over the past several years saying "Shame on you for not remembering Giada!" I usually retaliate by saying "See, if you had majored in anthro rather than history, you would have met Giada yourself." He turns grey-green like a corpse when I say this to him. Incidentally, Colin graduated from UCLA with a degree in history in the year 1997.

Of course, there is a the propofol problem, and the 89mm subdural hematoma Katy Perry inflicted on me, but since our first discussions on this subject predate my first knee surgery and the subdural hematoma, I am pretty sure we never met. This is not just a case of memory loss.

When Colin first brought her to my attention, my first impression was that she was a created media figure, a glam girl for the kitchen set. Nope. I was absolutely and completely wrong about that. Upon further review, I discovered that the woman has serious skills and more training than just about anybody on the Food Network.

Not only does she share a degree in anthro with me, but she shares a degree in culinary arts from the prestigious Le Cordon Bleu in Paris France with many 9th degree black belts. Folks, that's about as good as it gets. You must admit, this is a pretty good block of training for what she does. Not only that, but the training shows.

She has not influenced me a lot, primarily because she loves to make cofections: Cakes, pies, cookies, candies, you name it. She spends a lot of time doing this. I can see and understand why she is the femme super heroine of our day. The girls must love watching her show. Still, I respect the remarkable skill and knowledge she brings to the stand mixer.

Her skill and technique should not surprise anyone. She has her Mercury in Virgo, just like me. The most brilliant people always do.

I used to jest that a degree in Athro from UCLA and $1.00 would buy you a 12 ounce can of coke. After seeing the way my fellow Bruin anthropologist has conquered the world, I may have to reconsider this saying.

By some flukish roll of the dice, today just happens to be Giada's 40th birthday. Strange that I sat down to finally scribble out this blog entry today. I've been considering writing this entry for several months now. In any case, my best wishes for a happy 40th birthday today. The malady struck me down almost 4 years ago now, and in a week or so I will be turning 44 myself.

Damn... how did we all get this old this fast?