Back to the combine! It's better than Christmas!

Last Thursday night's NFL Total Access was our first broadcast from combine in Indianapolis.  That is a significant significator.  It's the official start of the NFL draft season.  It's the unofficial start of the NFL business season also.

Love it!

I was pretty excited when I saw that the gang had been fully reassembled:  Mike Mayock, Charley Casserly, Charles Davis, Mike Lombardi, et al.  We'll be seeing Bucky Brooks and Corey Chavis soon also, I am sure.  I had heard rumors that Charley Casserly had signed exclusively with CBS Sports, and I was worried we wouldn't be seeing him on the NFL Network this year.  It is a good thing that rumor was false.  It wouldn't be the same without him.

It is so damn good to see you guys again!  You have no idea.  I was going to blog on this subject Thursday night, but I was a little preoccupied with prep for my next surgery on Feb 28, and a number of other mundane household subjects.

Sometimes I get a good feeling.  I get a feeling that I never, never, never had before.  I gotta feeling that this is going to be a really good draft.  The crop looks bountiful.  The crop looks good.  I am confident that we have some franchise changing players scattered across the top of this draft.  I am sure some of these kids will make it to the Hall of Fame.  It won't surprise me when they do.

Last year I complained bitterly about the poor quality of the seniors, the QBs and the offensive linemen.  I didn't like the Linebackers either.  Von Miller was the sole exception, and one of the three most exciting players in the Draft last year.

2011 was a poor draft year.  This is not the case in 2012.  This is a PH PHAT draft class.  The prospects look damn good to me thus far.  I am excited.

Speaking of Charley, he had the first Mock draft of the combine last night, and I think he pretty well nailed it.  Charley's list looked like this

1. Colts:  Andrew Luck QB Stanford
2. Browns (from Rams):  Robert Griffin III QB Baylor
3. Vikings:  Matt Kalil OLT USC 
4. Rams (from Browns): Justin Blackmon WR Oklahoma State
5. Bucs:  Trent Richardson RB Alabama
6. Redskins:  Morris Claiborne CB LSU
7. Jaguars: Quinton Coples DE UNC
8. Dolphins:  Riley Reiff OT Iowa
9. Panthers:  Michael Brockers DT LSU
10. Bills:  Courtney Upshaw OLB Alabama

Most of the others felt he nailed it too.  The most critical critique came from Coach Brian Billick, who said "Charley's got 9 out of the top 10 players, and 6 in the right spot, so he's only wrong by 4.  That's pretty good!"

I would say it's probably a little more accurate than that.   What are the points of disputation here?  I think they are as follows:

1. The Redskins won't take Morris Claiborne
2. The Bucs will take Morris Claiborne one spot earlier
3. The Bucs won't take Trent Richardson. They already have a damn good power-back in LeGarrette Blount.
4. The Redskins won't go quietly into the good night without a QB in this draft.  Rumor has it that they are adamant about getting Robert Griffin III.  Charley is presuming the Rams will chose to drop back just a couple of steps to gain some extra picks and still get our man (Justin Blackmon) a little bit cheaper.  I think that's a pretty good guess.  I can't see our team passing on some extra picks, but we won't want to lose Justin Blackmon either.  Most believe we would be reaching for him at the #2 pick, based on our critical need.  This is probably and accurate assessment of the situation.
5. It is questionable whether the Dolphins would take another tackle so high in the draft when they already have the best OLT in all of football.  Riley Reiff would be relegated to right tackle duties, and generally, you don't take a right tackle so high.  Charley has said this himself.  I do understand the logic, though. Riley Reiff would seem to be the perfect bookend companion and counterpart to Jake Long.  If you get Peyton Manning in Miami, you might want to make this pick.  It will be a very tempting choice if Manning comes to town.
6. Some would dispute the Bills taking Courtney Upshaw, but the more I think about it, the more I think it is the perfect fit.  The Bills play a 3-4 defense and they need a pass-rushing elephant linebacker.  There is none better in 2012 draft than Courtney Upshaw.  He is an ideal choice for their needs and scheme.  Call me foolish, call me irresponsible, call me a dreamer, but I think he would go great with Marcell Dareus.  Wait... hasn't that been tried?  Did that workout once before?
7. Many of us are still questioning whether Trent Richardson will wind up going so high in the draft.  It's not that he's unworthy of the pick, he is a very worthy dude, but rather the fact that the RB position is so deeply deprecated in the modern NFL.  Most GMs just don't believe that you take an RB so high in the draft.  As always, it will only take one GM to make it happen, tho.

I look forward to many more of these blog posts as the Draft season continues.

What two moves will have the greatest impact in turning around the Rams fortunes in 2012?

The good folks at NFL radio were asking a pretty simple question today.  They phrased it several different ways. 

1. What two things would you do to make you team more competitive?
2. What are the highest impact moves your team can make to change their status for the better?
3. What roster additions would make the greatest impact on your favorite team?

‘Tis a fair questions and the one that every dedicated fan is asking himself this time of year.  It’s business season, afterall.  So here are my answers:

1. We need two wide receivers, specifically Justin Blackmon and Vincent Jackson.  One via the draft and one via free agency.  {We also need to resign Brandon Llyod, but this is separate issues.}
2. We need two high quality outside linebackers.  Who those two gents are, I will leave open.  I would take Zach Brown of UNC at the top of the 2^nd round, and try to find the best OLB available in the upcoming bonanza of free agency.  If Gregg Williams would prefer to get two veterans he knows personally, I would have no objections.  I would also prefer that we do it this way.

As I see things, the Rams have only two devastating weaknesses:  Wide Receiver and Outside Linebacker.   We’re strong elsewhere.

We could also use a couple of young and strong running backs.  Steve Jackson is turning 30 this year.  This is the notorious age-wall that kills just about all NFL running backs.  However, this is a commodity position.  Let’s exploit this fact.

Our offensive line could use some upgrades, but this is the time and place for Coach Fisher to show us his magic.  Throughout his career at the Oilers/Titans, Jeff Fishers teams were usually amazing strong in the trenches.  Their front 9 were almost always among the 4 or 5 best in the leagues.  Yet, very, very few of the men who manned these positions were 1st-round draft picks.  { Jevon Kearse and Albert Haynesworth are two noteworthy exceptions, but these are only two men among many.}  Jeff Fisher’s staff excelled at finding men in the 3^rd through 5^th round, and developing those talents.  Some were even undrafted free rookie free-agents.

For Ram-fans, this is the very best news about the hiring of Jeff Fisher.  He does believe in being strong in the trenches.  He can find great men in the middle rounds.  His staff will grind & polish these diamonds in the rough.  He does not believe in the pure Darwinian philosophy of “throw ‘em in and cut ‘em if they don’t work out immediately, and without coaching.”  It is an odious, egregious & despicable fact that the Rams have held to this philosophy for many years now.  Good riddance to this bad ideology.  Let’s cultivate some players.

So, to restate my thesis point:  We need two killer receivers and two killer outside linebackers.  Those are our high priority items.  If we can do that much, the Rams can make the Playoffs in 2012.  Why would I say that?  Aren't we pretty far from the playoffs?  Let me give you a list of reasons I have sketched out before:

1. There is nothing wrong with the Rams defense that cannot be repaired by fixing our wretched offense.
2. I know the Ram defense showed pretty poor stats during the season, but I am telling you the stats lie. 
3. Time of possession in 2011 was crucial to the Rams failure, both offensively and defensively.   Top rarely favored us.  We frequently lost the TOP battle by 5 minutes or more.  It got worse as the season went on.
4. With our offense going three-and-out all the time, it is incredible that TOP was as close as it was.  The TOP figures should have been much more lopsided than they were.  This is testimony to how many punts our defense forced.
5. If we can simply hold the football, flipping the TOP figures 2012, our defense will be vastly better.
6. Scoring is a huge issue for the Rams.  For the second time in just 3 years, the Rams were rock bottom of the league in offense.  Incidentally, offense is measured by points scored, not yardage.  I don’t know who the fool was who established that yardage was the measure of offense, but it is time for this egregious error to be corrected.  Yardage doesn’t win the game.  Points do.
7. The Rams scored only 193 total points in 2011.  This is just 12.06 points per game.  I don’t care how good your defense is, this is not enough to win games in the NFL. 
8. It should be noted that the Rams scored only 175 points in 2009, averaging 10.9 points per game.
9. It is absolutely clear that the Rams need massive upgrades at the offensive skill positions.  We are dying because we have lousy skilled-players on offense.
10. Of those lousy skilled-players on our offense squad, our receivers are the worst of the bunch.
11. The Rams have had the worst receiver corp in the NFL two years running.  I’m talking about 32^nd out of 32 teams.  I am talking about a crew of guys with hands of stone.  Dudes who couldn’t catch a cold running barefoot and naked through an Alaskan blizzard… soaking wet.
12. This is not a question of availability or health issues, as Devaney tried to spin it.  No friends, the quality of our guys are pretty low.  I only want Danny Amendola and Brandon Lloyd to return.  The rest can go. 
13. The main reason we can't score is that our receivers can't catch.  
14. With that said, a couple of Outside Linebackers will help.

Virgo-Pisces Alliance No.228: Why is Trent Dilfer Andrew Luck's biggest fan?

So, unless you have been under a rock for the past two years, you probably know the name of Andrew Luck.  You probably know that he is expected to the be the #1 over-all pick in the up-coming 2012 NFL Draft.  Unless something really unexpected happens, the Colts will take him and begin their rebuilding effort in verity & sooth.

I will blog about Jim Irsay's very interesting dilemma soon, but not this time.

One of the things football fans have noticed over the course of the past several months is that Andrew Luck has many advocates.  In fact, he has almost zero (0) detractors.

So far, only Phil Simms has risen in critique of Andrew Luck.  I have the greatest respect for Phil Simms, and I view him as one of the top-analysts of the game.  However, I think his critique of Andrew is off-base.  I just don't see it his way.  I just can't see on film what he claims to have seen on film.  When Phil says Andrew doesn't make NFL-type throws, I simply can't understand what he's talking about.  I've seen almost nothing but NFL-type throws out of the kid.  The weight of evidence is greatly against Phil.

Among all of the many advocates Andrew has, one stands out above all the rest.  That would be Trent Dilfer.  Trent Dilfer has said extraordinary things about Andrew.  Like what?  How about "Andrew Luck has no flaws".

Wow... that would make Andrew Luck perfect, now wouldn't it?  I rate the kid pretty dang high, but I would stop shy of perfect.  It's pretty clear that Trent doesn't shy away from that statement.  He believes Andrew will have the most glory-ladened career of all the young'ins coming up in the 2012 NFL Draft.  Trent really believes he is the perfect QB candidate.

It's to be expected.  Trent is a March 13, 1972 Pisces dude.  Andrew is a September 12, 1989 Virgo kid.  That's almost a perfect 180, folks.  The circular distance between March 13 and September 12 is almost exactly 180 degrees.  That is the most powerful angle for attraction, balance, and complementary.  Sirius 1.1 doesn't score them that high, but this is one of those false negatives I like to harp upon.  Looking at the two charts in comparison, I can see obvious things the scoring engine missed.  Dilfer likes Luck better than Sirius says.

Incidentally, Trent is birthday-buddies with my brother.  My brother is 3 years younger.  Once upon a time, I was Trent Dilfer's biggest advocate in the NFL Draft.  I was the leader of the Draft-Trent movement among the Ram fans back 1994.  I was so incandescently pissed-off  when my Rams failed to broker a deal in that draft that I literally took a couple of years off from football.  I knew we were going to suck.  1994-1998 were absolutely dreadful years, only exceeded by our recent stretch of time.  I maintain those would have been much better years if we had made a deal and selected Trent.  Our biggest problem in those days was the QB position.

If you have been keeping track of super-recent events, you know that a debate is emerging inside NFL business circles.  The question is simple.  Who is better:  Andrew Luck of Robert Griffin III?  This is natural occurrence.  We always have too much time on our hands this time of year, ergo we chew over questions and non-questions a thousand times.  Just a couple of months ago, this question would have been considered untenable.

I want to make some specific predictions about this coming debate:

1. It will rage on until draft day
2. RGIII's knee injury will not deter this debate.  Andrew had one also.
3. The Fire/Air Alliance will back RGIII
4. The Earth/Water Alliance will back Andrew Luck.
5. Mike Mayock is going to be torn.  He's next door to Andrew and 180 degrees away from RGIII.  He's going to struggle with this one.  I bet he loves both of these kids.
6. The same goes for Mel Kiper.
7. Todd McShay will side with RGIII
8. Trent Dilfer will continue to be Andrew Luck's biggest advocate.
9. Kurt Warner & Rich Eisen will side with Andrew Luck.

Congrats to the Giants, Super Bowl XLVI Champions

I held true to my vow and I boycotted the Super Bowl yesterday.  It was the best thing in the world for me, really.  I went to the gym and met an Aries female with a conjuncted Venus/Mars in Taurus.  Wow!  She is a pain-control therapist, and decided she just had to heal me.

I don't think I mentioned it lately, but I am pack of training injuries right now.  I injured my back on Pro-Bowl Sunday doing suspension work.  My right knee hurts from squatting.  My right shoulder still hurts.  My Carpal Tunnel still hurts.  My left ankle hurts.  She spent four hours working on me with a $6,000 theraputic laser... and other methods.

She told me that the first thing she though when she saw me was "what a face!"  I guess I put the whammy on her.  Then she noticed I was limping in semi-hunched fashion, indicating multiple pain points. As recently as yesterday, I seriously doubted Sirius 1.1's diagnosis of my synastry versus Aries females.  Now, empirical facts being what they are, I am being forced to reconsider.

So in other words, I got lucky because I skipped the Super Bowl.  Hallelujah!  Let's skip it again next year.

But I digress.

So the Giants doubled-down and humiliated the Patriots for a second time.  Rich Eisen can no longer argue that Tom Brady is the greatest QB in the history of the game {because he is from Michigan and married Gisele Bundchen}.  Eli has spoiled this legacy.  You keep what you kill.  Eli has killed Tom head-to-head four times in a row and twice in the Super Bowl.  Eli has killed him.  Eli must now be recognized as the greatest of all time, if you follow the fallacious QB logic that would have placed Tom Brady there in the first place.

Speaking of Gisele, she seems to have created a PR flap by saying her husband couldn't fucking throw the football and catch the fucking football at the same time.  In other words, his receivers dropped a bunch of key passes, resulting in this loss.

I have to issue a concurring opinion.  The Cancer woman is quite correct.  In the final analysis, the end difference in this very close game is the fact that the Giant receivers completely out-performed the Patriot receivers.  Hakeem Nicks, Mario Manningham and Victor Cruz kicked some major arse.  Brady's receivers did not.  This was the big bulging asymmetry that made the difference.  This was the difference that made a difference.

There is a zen lesson here for my Rams.  I know a QB who suffered a hundred times more drops than Brady did in 2011-2012.  This is a QB who has suffered with the worst receiver corp in the league two years running.  His receivers are so bad, they couldn't catch a cold running barefoot and naked through an Alaskan blizzard... soaking wet.

When you surround a QB like Eli with 3 kick-arse receivers, just look at what he can do.  When receivers drop passes, even a QB as accomplished as Tom Brady looks bad in the clutch.

The moral of this story is quite simple:  Surround Sam Bradford with three #1 class receivers, and everything is going to be alright.  This is what we have to do.  The mission is clear.  Now let's do it.

In conclusion, I just want to express my appreciation to Giants for knocking off the Patriots again.  The entire civilized football world owes you a great debt of gratitude.  I thank God for you.  We love you.  We appreciate you.  We are throwing bouquets at you.  I am sure I speak for all Ram fans when I say that.  Several major threads saying such things kicked off on facebook.com last night.  We are celebrating your victory.

So is James Harrison.  It just goes to show that Bellichick can't win without his camera crew.

100% Sports Blackout

So, football season ended a couple of weeks early for me this year.

I am about 72 hours into a 100% sports blackout.  By that I mean that I am conducting a 100% boycott of all sports broadcasts, news, entertainment and information.  I am talking about a 100% free-sports free diet of media.

This means:

1. No bloody ESPN TV.
2. No bloody ESPN radio.
3. No bloody ESPN.com
4. No bloody NFL Network
5. No bloody NFL.com
6. No bloody Fox Sports Radio
7. No bloody CBSSports.com

Nothing!  I mean jack-nothing.  The next time I tune into the NFL Network, the calendar will say Feb 6, 2012.

I have no intentions of watching the Super Bowl this year.  I will go to the movies for a double-header on Sunday Feb 5, 2012.  I'm not sure what I will see.  Perhaps the new Underworld movie.   Perhaps Man on a Ledge.

This fast is not without pain.  I am missing some of the pre-draft senior games, which are terrific for scouting prospects.

Most painful off all, I caught the two hour BioHD documentary on the Bee Gees.  I was arrested and transfixed in horror, shock and awe.  It only goes to show the kind of hell can be unleashed upon the face of the by one Virgo and two Capricorns when they turn to the dark-side and use their powers for evil.

Just in case you were wondering why I am executing a 100% sports blackout, the answer is simple:  I am pissed about this match-up.  The last thing I ever needed to see in this life is the fucking Patriots in the Super Bowl again.  It is worse still that they will play the New York Giants.

This naturally means a 14 day food-fight between Boston and New York.  Lots of New York Dry-Wall technicians & Boston Longshoremen flicking boogers at each other for 14 days.  I don't need that.

This is a Super Bowl of very limited regional interest.

It's a wretched and disgusting Super Bowl this year

Are you excited about this Super Bowl match-up?  If so, your from Boston or New York.  That's all.  Only this and nothing more.  There is nothing here for a West Coast guy in Los Angeles to be interested in.

Couldn't be worse if you ask me.  This exactly the match up we didn't need to see.  This is the worst of all possible combo scenarios given our four contestants.  Now we have to listen to endless bullshit about Bellichick getting a shot at redeeming his erstwhile undefeated season.  We have to listen to endless bullshit about the Giants proving that SB42 wasn't a fluke event.

In short, it is going to be absolutely horrendous 14 day period until we can get this goddamn fucking sonofabitch bastard whore season over with.  The NFL Network's viewership is going down by one DVR count.  ESPN's viewership is going down by one count.  I won't be tuning in for any of this.

I'm watching the FoodNetwork, BioHD, and ScienceHD.

I don't need to listen to any of this hype.  I am not interested in the narrative you are about to weave.  I do not need to listen Boston yelling at New York and New York yelling back again.  It's an All-East-Coast food-fight just made perfect for goddamn fucking ESPN.

To all of the Sports Writers of America:  The Super Bowl narrative you are about to weave absolutely sucks.  I'm talking about a raw-red stinker of a lousy sports story.  Fuck you in the ass... twice... hard... with no lube!

I just might skip the Super Bowl this year.  The last time I did that, it was Super Bowl XXIV.  That was a good one to skip, by the way.  Horrible game.  Worst ever.

All I can say is this:  The Giants better win this game.  You know you will never hear the end of the fluke talk if you don't.  If you double-down and jam the Patriots a second time, it will be quite glorious.  You will be able to give Boston the finger forever more.

I have to say, it was an utterly disgraceful win the Patriots got away with.  You know the story.  Everybody has reported on it.  If Lee Evans doesn't drop the game winning touchdown pass, the Ravens go to the Super Bowl.  If Billy Cundiff doesn't follow that immediately with a shanked field goal, we go into overtime.  What a disgraceful and ignominious way to back-door your way into the Super Bowl.  This is highly characteristic of Bellichick.

This wasn't Joseph's fault folks.  He played well enough to win.  He didn't lose this battle for you.

How 'bout that Tebow 27.5? And Thomas too!

So, I need to catch-up on some much needed sleep, and I really shouldn't be blogging right now.  However, I just couldn't let this night pass without sticking it right in the collective-eye of the critics.

If you listened to even 45 minutes of analysis this week, you know well that the Denver Broncos had an absolute 0.0000000000000% chance of wining this playoff game today.  That is absolute zero, ziltch, zip, nada, nothing.  They had no chance to win.  Everybody agreed with Merril Hodge.  Tim Tebow stood no chance against Dick LaBeau's defense.  The Steelers were going to eat him alive.

Folks on NFL Live made bold predictions that the Broncos would be absolutely shutout by the Steeler-defense.  That is, the Broncos would score zero, ziltch, zip, nada, nothing in terms of points in this game.

It turns out that Tim Tebow shot 10 for 21 for 316 yards and 2 touchdowns.  The Broncos put 29 points on the scoreboard.  That's 29 more than they were supposed to put on the board.  Tebow had a QB efficiency rating over 125.  Ben Roethlisburger had a QBR of 75.  Tebow out-QB'd Roethlisburger by some 50 points worth of QBR.

How 'bout 'dem apples?  That's a pretty sizable QBR differential, ain't it?  Surprising that the Steelers were able to hang in there as long as they were with a QBR differential like that.  A 125 next week will probably give the Denver Broncos a pretty good QBR differential also.

Of course, everybody is still buzzing about the first-ever overtime period after the recent rules changes by the NFL Competition Committee.  We were supposed to have an OT period in which both teams got a chance to touch the football.  Nope, didn't happen like that.  Tebow took the snap on the 20, hit Demaryius Thomas at around the 50 with a sweet pass, and Demaryius took off.  Nobody could stop him.  One stiff-arm later, Thomas was in the End-Zone.

Overtime lasted one-snap and just 11 seconds.  That was the most sudden sudden-death I ever saw.  I've been watching NFL Football since 1979 folks.  That's longer than some of you have been alive.

It should be noted that Demaryius Thomas is a December 25th, Christmas Capricorn baby.  He is showing some tremendous chemistry with this Leo kid named Tim Tebow.  I have a feeling these two are going to be a famous combo.  Thomas averaged 51 yards per reception nailing 204 yards on just 4 receptions.

In all seriousness folks, I have no idea how the geniuses out there in television-land came to conclusion that the Broncos stood no chance against the Steelers.  Just looking at the Steeler injury list, which resembled a small telephone book, you absolutely could not rule out the Broncos.

It's time for you buggers at ESPN to confess:  You had a religious belief that Tebow and the Broncos couldn't win this game.  It was a faith-based position, not a position based on fact or logic.  It was a metaphysical position.

I'm laughing like hell at you, and I am wondering when you are going to stop cheering against this kid.

The 2011 NFL Season is over... mercifully enough!

So the regular season ended yesterday.  Thank God!  Not a moment too soon if you ask me.  You may be experiencing a sense of loss, but not me.  If you are a Ram-fan, you have been waiting for the end of this nightmare for sometime now.  It couldn't end soon enough.  You are glad you finally woke up from a long and tormented sleep.

The deed has been done.  Steve Spagnuolo and Billy Devaney have been fired.  You can read about it here. As you know, I have been gunning for Devaney for the better part of two years.  His poor eye for talent and his sub-par drafts are what got us here.  You can seriously question his priority list also.  I am less keen to see Spags go.

Now it is time for the real work to begin.  Now we have to begin the rebuild in earnest.

I will be out of my mind with rage if we hire Jeff Fisher.  I won't have it.  That just might be the end of my 31 years as a Ram-fan.  I don't care what anybody says, Jeff Fisher is not a coaching A-Lister.  His record with the Oilers/Titans was very mediocre.  He never won the Super Bowl, we beat him in the Super Bowl, and his Titans often failed to make the playoffs. He was the most over-rated coach in the league during his long tenure with the Oilers/Titans.

The only big credit to Jeff Fisher's his name is the fact that he knows how to last in a Bush-League organization.  I want Stan Kroenke to know that if he hires Jeff Fisher, he's sending the wrong message.  He's sending the message that he wants a coach who can last in a Bush-League organization... like the Rams.

Furthermore, I am hoping and praying the Chargers will not fire A.J. Smith.  I am hoping and praying he will not  even be available for the Rams' candidate list.  Hiring A.J. will certainly be the end of my 31 years as a Ram fan.  I hate that guy with a passion.  He is an A-Lister on the ass-hole list.  He is one of the few 100% pure, unrefined, unadulterated assholes in the NFL.  Most assholes have at least a few trace quantities of impurities in their asshole nature.  Not A.J. Smith.  He is 100% pure asshole.

2011 NFL Season, Week 15 Results

Week 15... a week that will live in infamy.  A week of disgusting upsets.  Consequently, I had my worst week of the year at 7-8.  A loosing record for Christ's sake!  This never happens to me!  If it is any consolation, the dudes at ESPN didn't fare much better than I did.

I guess you can argue that the meek inherited the league (for one week) but now we must suffer all manner of rubbish discourse about whether the Chargers are actually the strongest team in the AFC.  We also have to suffer the remonstrations of Patriot bleeders who think the great pretenders of 2011 are the strongest team in the AFC.  'Taint so.

I want to make two things perfectly clear:

1. No learned, responsible, knowledgeable evaluator of the NFL expected the Chargers to be a powerhouse this season.  [Don't wave Michael Irvin around either; he was just being loyal to his old coach.]  Why?  Because they are not a powerhouse in 2011.  They have not been a powerhouse this season.  They've been chumps for the most part.  This is because of the odious actions of their GM A.J. Smith and their weak coaching staff.
2. The Patriots are dead meat in the playoffs.  I'm talking about a quick and easy out in the first round again.  They are going to be in and out like a pinche vato.  The Patriots are the great pretenders of the NFL.  You wanna crown their ass?  Then crown them, but they are who I think they are.  That's why their opponents should take the damn field.

I'm disgusted.

My brother from another mother, Kurt Warner, laid the jinx down on Green Bay during NFL Game Day Morning Edition on the NFL Network.  "The only way this team drops a game is if they all have that proverbial one-bad-game; the game where everyone comes out flat", said Warner.  He was a prophet and didn't know it.  The Packers came out and did precisely that, losing to a team they had absolutely no business losing too.

Pop the corks in Miami.  You remain the only undefeated team in the modern history of the league.  I am disappointed for the Pack.  I thought they would do it.  One loss won't stop them from going back-to-back, tho.

I don't know which was worse, the Patriots up-ending my Broncos, or the Chargers laying a once-in-a-blue-moon beat-down on the Ravens.  Don't read anything into it, art critics.  This performance is never again to be repeated.  Stick a fork in the Chargers, they are now done for the season.

At the end of the day, the Ravens will be the AFC Champs.  Broncos versus Ravens in Baltimore for the AFC title.

Two terrible suggestions for the Rams

Lately, two terrible suggestions for future moves have being sloshed about loosely in public.

Some have suggested that the Rams should select Andrew Luck if we should be so fortunate as to win the Andrew Luck Sweepstakes. The second terrible suggestion is that we can or will use EVP Kevin Demoff's family connections to get former Titans coach Jeff Fisher in the building.

I shit upon both suggestions, straight-up and no chaser. Shakes, nates, bollocks, nay, no, never, forget about it!

Fortunately, I think both propositions are completely irrelevant to the true situation. We have two victories, the Colts have none. I think the Colts will cruise to the #1 slot. We may well win the #2 slot. This is more than fine with me. It spares us from the morons who would give up on Sam Bradford already. Further, it gives us plenty of picking power to grab Justin Blackmon, the proper target of our draft.

I think Kevin Demoff is on his way out, ergo there is little chance his family connections will be involved in the new coaching search. Rule out Jeff Fisher. He's going to San Diego where he will enjoy a perfect Gemini/Sagittarius alliance with Philip Rivers.

If we are going after one of the so-called 'top coaching candidates', I would like that to be John Gruden. This would entail a reversion to the WCO, but worse things have happened. Gruden is the only so-called A-Lister that I would endorse.

How about that Tebow III?

On a recent NFL Total Access, The Playmaker Michael Irvin quoted the 1st Epistle to the Corinthians 1:27:  But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise.  Of course, this is the King James translation.  I always preferred the NIV and NASB myself.  The NASB translates it:  but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise.  Now wasn't that better?

The quote was sited in regard to the offense Tim Tebow is running in Denver right now.  "This offense is foolishness, but is confounding all of us analysts who think we are wise", said Irvin.

Absolutely correct.  I have no objections to that statement.  I would only ask one further question:  Where the hell were you guys back in 2006 when all of us were being confounded in Tim Tebow's freshman year?  We went through that whole toxic shock resulting from exposure to the spread-option zone-read offense back in 2006.

You know the Florida Gators won the BCS Championship that year by spanking a very polished Ohio State team?  That the first of two championships we didn't think they could win.  After they won their second championship in 2008, over a Sam Bradford led Oklahoma Sooner team, it became very clear that this foolishness works.

However, it's clear you guys missed the party back then.  The looks on your faces resemble the look I had on my face back in 2006.  I wrote about that several times during the 2010 draft.

I have always been something of a Florida fan since the days of Steve Spurrier.  I totally loved that beautiful Gillman-Coryell offense he ran back at Florida.  I was a big fan of Danny Wuerffel back in those days also.

When Urban Meyer arrived in Florida... well... hehehehe... Let's just say I was quite upset by early results.  We had a two-headed QB monster with Chris Leak at the helm most of the time.  He was the nominal passer.  The Fearless Freshman Tim Tebow would come in on short yardage situations.  They would line up with 5 wide and an empty backfield.  Tim would run the football straight up the middle where there was no hole.  He would wind up popping for 7 to 15 yards a shot when there was no gap in the defense and no room to run.  I had no idea how the hell he did it, but the fans went berserk every time he came in.  It was a love affair from day one.

I thought it was the wackiest offense I had ever seen in my Goddamn life.  I wished they would fire Urban Meyer so we could get coach Spurrier back in there and run that beautiful Gillman-Coryell offense again. The Zone-Read-Option was an insult to my intelligence.

But then Florida's BCS championship victory over Ohio State stunned me.  I had no idea how they managed to get there, much less win in such convincing fashion.  I just had to accept the fact that the system works.

Tebow grew on me enormously.  I developed quite a bond with the kid.  This was the son I wished I had sired.  I later discovered he has exactly the same Moon, Venus and Mars signs I do.  The kid's emotional composition, sense of aesthetics, and drive are the same as mine.  We have quite a score according to Sirus 1.1, incidentally.  Of course, mentioning this would annoy Tebow to no end.

Fast forward to the 2010 draft.  It became clear that my Rams were going to replace Marc Buldger, a move I did not support.  However, if we were going to replace Buldger, it had to be Tebow as far as I was concerned.  I told everybody how much I loved this kid.  I wrangled on-line endlessly with those who favored Sam Bradford.

At the time, we didn't think Tebow would go in the first round.  I wanted to use the #1 pick on Ndamukong Suh, and get Tim with the #33 pick.  As it turns out, this would not have worked.  Just imagine where we might be today if we might have pulled it off somehow...

I hate to mention it, but the Broncos have 300% more victories than my Rams do right now.  Whooopse... did I say that?  Don't take it personally, Sam.  We didn't equip you for victory his year.  We had absolute rubbish at the WR position until John Elway gave us the gift of Brandon Lloyd.  I've been shouting this at everybody who will listen, incidentally.  We'll get you Justin Blackmon in this year's draft.

In summary, Michael Irvin is quite correct when he says this foolishness is confounding the wise. Still, I wonder why you guys didn't know all this by the beginning of 2009?  Don't you watch college football?  Am I the only one?

You might say that can't work in the NFL, but it is obvious that it does.  Further, it's based on the same great principle that the Gillman-Coryell offense is:  Just hit it where they ain't.  Attack the emptiness and avoid the fullness, as Tzun-Tzu says in The Art of War.  If you always attack the weak spot in the defense, you'll always enjoy moderate success.  It's just that simple.

The one thing that really troubles me is this:  Tim Tebow can pass.  He's just not doing it right now.  He had a college QBR of 175 over his entire four year career in the SEC.  He had massive passing numbers in 2007, the year he won the Heisman.  I have seen him throw the football vastly better than he has done it lately.  I know he can pass.  I think you guys have given my boy a complex.  He's heard you say he can't throw the ball so many times, he is starting to believe it.

Shake it off, Tim.  Remember who you are.  Don't listen to the bullshit.  You threw the ball just fine back in college.  Do what you did back then.  Just make your decision and throw with confidence. If you get your passing confidence back, the Broncos can run the table and go 11-5.

We have apparent confirmation that Coach Spags and Devaney are on the Hot Seat

Today, November 28th, 2011 is the day when we got our first apparent confirmation that Coach Spags and GM Devaney are on the Hot Seat.  The word comes from none other than Jason La Canfora of the NFL Network, and it was published in print on the NFL's own website.

You can read it here.  SB Nation has another piece here.

We can now say, with honesty, that a serious source indicates that these two are in trouble.  La Canfora deals in rumor and innuendo, but he is seldom wrong.  I have gone hard against him a couple of times (in the case of the Donovan McNabb trade) and I wound up with egg on my face.  He was right, and I was wrong.  This guy doesn't piss in the wind.  If Jason says it, it has to be taken seriously.

There is just one caveat:  Farmers Field in Los Angeles.  Everybody knows the Rams are the #1 contender to play in Farmers Field.  Everybody knows AEG Productions are looking for two teams and not one.  How else do you get the full 1.2 billion stipulated in the Farmers Insurance contract?  They aren't going to leave that money on the table without a fight and half to get it.

With two teams headed to Los Angeles, it hard to imagine a scenario in which the Rams aren't one of them.  You just haven't heard it from officials sources due to the gag order issued by NFL HQ in New York.  Yep, that's right, the Commish done issued a gag order.  Keyshawn Johnson spilled the beans about that one on ESPN Radio.

I seldom discuss this subject because it upsets my St. Louis brethren so deeply.  Believe me, I know how they feel.  We went through it in 1994 here.

In short, La Canfora eludes to the often whispered conspiracy theory that Stan Kroenke will allow this inept front office to struggle for one more year before executing a 100% rebuild of the organization on the West Coast.  It's not so much that it will drive the box office revenues down, thus permitting a move.  Rather, its a question of how to rebuild the team most effectively in concert with a big move across country.

As I have said before, I would prefer that Spags stay, but I am increasingly alone on an island.  Most fans have had it with his offensive & special teams conservatism, as well as his clock management skills.  Perhaps it is because I am an old nose tackle who wished he had played in Spags' 4-3 scheme, but I think well of him.  He will be rehired immediately by the Giants, I can assure you of that.  They just haven't been the same without him.

Still, If Stan Kroenke does what I suspect, he will clean and flush the front office this off-season.  A new management team will be given instructions to do everything necessary to prepare the team for the move to the West Coast.  Stan may even appoint a new Team President, something he has not yet done.  The post has been vacant since former President John Shaw snuck out the back door.  

I, for one, would add my voice to those clamoring for Dick Vermeil's appointment as Team President.  Let's make him the boss, and let him pick his management team.

2011 NFL Season Week 11 Predictions

It's pretty easy slate of choices in week #11.  There is some room for disagreement here, mostly with the small potatoes.  We have only one marque match-up between contenders this week:  Bengals @ Ravens.  Every other game is either a small fry match-up or a mis-match.

1. Raiders @ Vikings is basically a mis-match.  If Carson Palmer shoots a QBR of 152.6 in the first half of this game, the competitive phase will be over quickly.  This game might be close, but I think the Raiders have every advantage except homefield.
2. Bills @ Dolphins is a real head-ache.  The Bills are now officially in a tailspin after getting humiliated in Dallas.  I still don't feel confident in picking the Dolphins because of Sparano's situation there.  I also feel that the Bills have better talent.  They say you never bet against the streak, and the Bills are on a losing streak.  However, there comes a time when all streaks end.  I take the Bills.
3. Jags @ Brows is another major headache.  This is a small-fry match-up.  I find it difficult to pick the Browns after the way they lost ugly to my Rams, who won even uglier.  Still, the Browns have homefield and the Jags are nothing to write home about.  You have to hold your nose and pick one of them.  I take the Browns.
4. Bengals @ Ravens is the key match of the week.  This is the game we will all be watching.  The Ravens are inconsistent, and the Bengals are young.  Both teams are very good, but I think the veteran Ravens are much more talented.  The Raven offense is struggling, and the Bengal defense is good.  The Bengal offense is going to either miss A.J. Green or deal with a hobbled A.J..  This isn't good when you face the Raven defense.  The Bengals can win this game, but percentage-wise, I think the Ravens are more likely.
5. Panthers @ Lions is another headache galore.  The Lions are talented but slumping, and their QB has a busted finger on his passing hand.  Super-Cam has made the Panthers competitive in most games.  What happens here?  I think the Lions get up off the carpet and re-assert themselves.  Still this verdict is hard to justify when their QB has a busted finger and nobody to carry the mail for him.
6. Bucs @ Packers looks like a serious mismatch.  They say you never bet against the streak, but there comes a time when all streaks end.  I remember a time, not so long ago, when a very similar Viking team visited Tampa Bay with a 9-0 record.  The Vikings had a high-powered offense and a leaky defense.  They had a QB playing MVP caliber football.  The Bucs snapped that streak.  This time it is a little bit different.   I think the Packers will go 10-0
7. Cowboys @ Redskins also looks like a mismatch.  The Cowboys already won the first match at a time when the Redskins were playing much higher quality football.  Further, the Cowboys are surging now that Tony Romo has a little bit of time to throw the football.  The Redskins' offense looks like a basket case.  I just don't think the 'skins can score enough to win.  I take the Cowboys.
8. Cardinals @ 49ers...  This is a mismatch and the 49ers have homefield.  Forget about it.
9. Seahawks @ Rams... Awe those pesky Seahawks!  They have no shot at the playoffs or doing anything at all, but they are intent upon upsetting people, especially their fans who wish they were in a position to draft Andrew Luck.  No such Luck.  Matches between tomato cans are more difficult to pick than match ups between high-caliber teams.  Inconsistency is the key to pick'em difficulty.  I am going to roll with my Rams, our home-field advantage our better QB, our better RB, and our singular receiver.  Our defense is much-maligned, but the criticism is overstated.  If the offense could have stayed on the field for more than 3 downs during the first 5-6 games of the season, our defense would be ranked much higher.
10. Titans @ Falcons... oh those pesky Titans!  They are a rebuilding franchise and they don't want to admit it.  Although they are 5-4, and equal to the Falcons in record, I honestly don't believe these Titans have a significant shot at the post-season.  I do expect the Texans to fall-forward and take the single playoff spot from the AFC South.  On the other hand, the Falcons remain a contender for a playoff birth, and I think they are a much more talented team.  I'm taking the Falcons... and they better not let me down, or I'll fly to Atlanta and whup...
11. Chargers @ Bears might be the game that costs Nov Turner his job as head coach.  They say never bet against the streak.  Philip Rivers is on a big-interception streak, and so to are Bears.  The Bears defense is ball-hawking like crazy and the Chargers are very accommodating in this regard.  This spells doom for the Chargers if you ask me.
12. Eagles @ Giants is unlikely to be one for the ages.  The NFL Network has been doing it's utmost to remind us of some of the historically great matches between these two teams, but this just won't be one of them.  The Eagle D is struggling like hell, and now their offense will be minus Michael Vick and Jeremy Maclin.  Forget about it!  The Giants will probably come out foaming at the mouth after losing to the 49ers.  I think the Eagles will take a butt-whooping here.  They can take it any which way they want to take it, but they are going to take it.
13. Chiefs @ Patriots:  I concur with Tom Waddles' statement about this game.  This is like Mike Tyson well out of his prime facing Butter Bean. 'Nuff said.  

2011 NFL Season, Week 10 Results

It was an absolutely dreadful week.  My record was a paltry 8-7, just one game above .500!  Unbelievable!

It wasn't a good weekend for the ESPN crew either.  Eric Allen beat me with a record of 10-6, and Wickersham edged me with a record of 9-7, but nobody else did.  All our prediction records took a hit this weekend.  Mike Golic brought up the rear with a record of 5-11.  You can see their scores here.

So why the disaster this weekend?  Because we had a few major upsets and some very difficult choices to make this week.  Nobody but nobody expected the Seahawks to beat the Ravens.  Nobody but nobody expected the Cardinals to beat the Eagles in their crib.  Few expected the Broncos to win, but I did.  I don't know why you would pick the Chiefs these days.

There were also tough choices like the Saints vs. Falcons, Jets vs. Patriots, Cowboys vs. Bills, and 49ers vs. Giants. Now the Cowboy game turned out to be shockingly lopsided, and so was the Patriot game, but other than that, we saw close fights.

I will return to my high-percentage ways this coming week, I assure you of that.

Oooppppsss! 2001 Season Week 9 Outcomes

I just realized that I forgot to publish my results from Week 9 of the 2011 NFL Season.  She-yit!  How did I managed to do this?  Well... last week was very busy.  I guess I just forgot.

In any case, my record was 9-5.  Nothing to boast about, but only Eric Allen of ESPN managed to match my record of success.  Everybody else was less accurate than me and Eric.  You can see their picks here for the record.  I am proud that I called both of the big games correctly.  I nailed Ravens v. Steelers and also the Giants v. Patriots.

One of these days I hope to hear from the NFL Network about that software management position.  They can use my gaming-calling skills as an added free bonus.

2011 NFL Season, Week 10 Predictions

Week 10, the most difficult week of the year thus far, if you ask me.  There are a number of very interesting games on tap for this Sunday.  This schedule should make for some pretty good television drama.  This will truly be a shake-out weekend.

This is not a bye-week.  All 32 teams have been or will be in action.  The first game went down on Thursday night, and I think you all know that Carson Palmer won that game in fairly spectacular fashion for the Oakland Raiders.  Of course, I am too late to the betting window for that game, so here is my slate of picks.

1. Bills @ Cowboys is an interesting match of two fading teams.  Most experts expect the Cowboys to prevail because the Bills are fading-out.  Believe me, they are not the only ones fading-out.  At the moment, the Bills are ahead of the Cowboys on total-defense and total-offense based on points.  I am going to have to roll with that, picking the Bills against the Cowboys' home-field advantage.
2. Titans @ Panthers.  The Titans are fading, and they are struggling to score points now.  The Panthers are getting better, and they have not struggled much offensively, due to the horsepower Cam Newton provides.  I am taking the Panthers based on better scoring offense and home field.
3. Texans @ Bucs is a pretty easy pick if you ask me.  The Bucs are struggling in many ways.  The Texans are beginning to hit on all cylinders.  I am taking the Texans on general superiority.
4. Jaguars @ Colts.  The Colts have transformed from a an aerial circus offense directed by Peyton Manning to an erstwhile power-running team under Curtis Painter.  The problem is that they can't run.  The Colts are 27th in points scored, a place they never dwell.  Now the Jags are dead-last in points scored, but they also feature the #8 defense by points.  Honestly, if the Colts are going to win one this year, this might be the game, but I don't think they can score enough to win against the #8 defense.
5. Cardinals @ Eagles is a big mismatch, and the Eagles have home-field also.  The Eagles are anything but the dream team, but the Cardinals are a whole lot worse, especially on the offensive line.
6. Saints @ Falcons is the first meeting between these NFC South rivals this year.  One team will exit this match-up a contender, the other team will suffer damage to their playoff standing.  If you ask me this is the toughest game to pick on the entire board.  I almost punted by saying "Pick'em".  However, the Falcons are missing their crucial Left-Tackle Sam Baker.  He is out with a back injury.  I think this will be the difference.  I take the Saints.
7. Rams @ Browns is a match-up of small-fries, and it is very difficult to pick because of that.  Most experts believe the Rams have to be favored because the Browns are suffering the #30 ranked defense against the run.  The Rams have a good line (for the run, at least) and Steven Jackson.  The reason for the Browns defensive problems is obvious.  They have not mastered team defense.  Their gap-discipline breaks down quickly.  They over-pursue a lot.  I am leery of this choice because the Brown are ranked higher than the Rams in points scored and points allowed, but I will make the homer-choice and pick my Rams.
8. Redskins @ Dolphins features the DOA Redskin offense against a newly resurgent Dolphin defense.  I just don't believe the Redskins can score enough to win in this game.  I take the Dolphins and their home field advantage.
9. Broncos @ Chiefs features my son, Tim Tebow, against the little girl with the curl. I don't think I have ever seen a Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde team quite like these Kansas City Chiefs.  When they are good, they are very, very good.  When they are bad, they are horrid.  This is the most inconsistent football team in the entire NFL.  They just laid a stinker against the Dolphins last week, and I cannot pick them with any degree of comfort this week.  I think Tebow wins again.
10. Steelers @ Bengals.  Quick reality check for you:  Did you know the Bengals are currently the #1 seed in the AFC tournament at this stage of the season?  They have the #3 ranked defense, and they have a rookie QB/WR tandem that is the best in NFL history.  I think the Bengals are going to step up this week and make a political statement at home.
11. Ravens @ Seahawks seems like a mismatch, but we have seen the Ravens look exhausted after victory over the Steelers before this season.  I worry about this match up because of the tremendous home field advantage the Seahawks enjoy in Qwest Field.  However, the Seahawks are a vastly inferior football team when compared to the Ravens.  I still believe the Ravens are the most powerful football team in the AFC.  I am taking the Ravens.
12. Lions @ Bears is a really pesky match-up.  Those Bears... those fricken' pesky Bears...  They don't seem set to do anything this season, but they hang around and upset people who should beat them.  I believe the Lions are a vastly better team, so I am taking the Lions, but I will be monitoring this one closely.
13. Giants @ 49ers is the game of the week if you ask me.  I doubt the Saints and the Falcons can match up with the Packers.  For some reason, I expect the Packers' chief rival for the NFC crown to emerge from this football game.  It seems like old times.  The Giants and the 49ers were once a premiere match up back in the 1980s and early 1990s.  Now it is again.  This game could go either way, but I expect the 49ers to prevail because of their [H]ardcore defense.  Did you know that the 49er defense is #1 in the league by points allowed.  Furthermore, Matt Millen says they have the best front-seven in the league.  Expect a low-scoring brutal grudge-match reminding us all of the 1990 NFC championship game.
14. Patriots @ Jets is a rematch, and the final meeting between these two in the regular season.  In the first game, the Patriots prevailed 30-21.  I do not believe the Patriots have what it takes to sweep the Jets, and not on their home field.  I am taking the Jets.
15. Vikings @ Packers is another mis-match.  I am taking the Packers in the easiest choice on the board.

How 'bout that Tebow II?!?!?

As I have often said, Tim Tebow is the son I never had.  That's my boy!

You would expect me to comment a lot more often about him because of that, but objectively speaking, I have not.  Why is that?  Primarily because I have been trying to keep a civil tongue in my head.  If I blogged on this subject every time I felt the impulse, you'd get at least one hard rant every day.

There is a great deal of Tebow-baiting going on out there in the media, and it isn't because the members of the media hate Tim.  They bait the line for both Tebow-haters and Tebow-fans  because doing so is absolutely fantastic for ratings.  I let them sucker me into the dummy-debate, or should we call it a tebate, during the run up to the 2010 draft.  I felt pretty stupid for being suckered into media-swirl after the fact.  I was great for the ratings, but it didn't do me much good.

Understand that no matter what Tebow does in terms of Pro achievements, there will be Erhardt-Perkins purists who will always hate this kid.  Likewise, there will always be scientific-materialist-atheists who will always hate this kid.  They don't even care what the kid does on the field.

On the other hand, there will be those (like Jack Youngblood me) on the other side of the fence who see one hell of a competitor and an engine of victory in this kid.  No matter how many mistakes Tebow makes in the early going, we're not going to be shaken.  We know the kid is destined for greatness.  Just give him a chance to learn and develop and he will do fine.

Just remember this: Brett Favre made a ton of mistakes in his run towards franchise-QB status.  He had enough bad days that Mike Holmgren had to threaten to bench him several times before he got the message.  John Elway was considered a bust in his first two years in the league.  Elway did not enjoy success immediately, and he might just be the greatest QB in entire history of the league.  Peyton Manning didn't look fantastic in his first year as a Pro, but we all know he is another likely suspect when we talk about the greatest of all-time.

I really had to bite my tongue hard after Week-8.  We saw many "experts" in the media 'seriously' disusing whether the Tim Tebow experiment should be over and done with after one bad game.  I am sure this triggered tons and tons of social media activity and gave the media lots of attention.  In short, they got what they wanted out of it.  It was just another attempt to trigger another dummy debate, and I knew it, but it irked me nonetheless.

It's preposterous to think that either John Fox or John Elway are so uncertain, so unsteady, so wavering, so swaying as to give up on a young QB after just one bad game.  Nevertheless, this is how the media spun the story.  It was just a naked attempt to sprinkle a little napalm on Tebow's followers and get them to respond to the show.  This boosts the ratings.  Ergo, I didn't comment.

I am very pleased that Tebow railgunned the Oakland Raiders yesterday.  It hurt my prediction record, but I couldn't be happier about it.  You know I hate the Raiders.  You know I love Tebow.  When Tebow railgunned the Raiders...  well... let's just say that's one of the finest moments I've had during this otherwise bleak season.

Of course, we have to give Eddie Royal a lot of credit there also.  He had the game winning return, after all.  Tim gave Eddie the spotlight on Facebook just a little while ago, and he was right to do so.

I am fairly certain this is not the Broncos' final victory of the year.  I look forward to several more, and I expect Tim Tebow to continue to show improvement throughout the course of this season.

2011 NFL Preseason Prediction

So, after seeing most of preseason games on the NFL Network, CBS and Fox, I feel as confident as I ever will about issuing my preseason predictions. I hereby predict that the 2011-2012 NFL Playoff picture will look like this

NFC Tournament

1. Packers 13-3
2. Falcons 12-4
3. Eagles 11-5
4. Rams 8-8
5. Saints 11-5
6. Lions 10-6

AFC Tournament

1. Ravens 13-3
2. Jets 12-4
3. Texans 11-5
4. Chargers 8-8
5. Patriots 11-5
6. Colts 10-6

NFC North

The defending world champion Packers are the prohibitive favorite to repeat as the NFC North champ. They also prohibitive favorites to repeat as world champs. Most of us see the Packers the same way. This team is straight-up loaded to the gills. If they can win the Super Bowl in year as ravaged by injury and adversity as last season, what in the world will stop them this year? This is the best bet to repeat since the 1992-1993 Dallas Cowboys.

The Bears made some major mistakes in the draft and in free agency. They did nothing much to repair their dreadful offensive line. They did nothing to equip their QB with weapons. The Bears have a nasty historical tendency to be good one year and down the next. All of this adds up to the conclusion that the Bears will barely factor in the NFC North.

The Vikings may be a bit better with Donovan McNab at the helm, but I don't expect a full return to respectability. I expect them to be competitive, not dreadful, and finish 9-7.

This brings us to the Lions. Rich Eisen says the Fire Marshall has ordered people off the bandwagon due to overcrowding and safety issues. The Lions are everybody's preseason darlings. It's about time. This is a long-suffering fan base who have waited, and waited... This team is loaded everywhere except the Secondary and the OL positions. Those are both critical weaknesses. Nevertheless, I expect the Lions to do very well. I predict a 10-6 record a #6 seed in the NFC tournament.

NFC East

We've heard a lot about the Eagles being the NFL's equivalent of the Miami Heat Dream-Team, and there is some merit in these comments. I think Eagles have to be favored to win the division at this point. This does not mean they will ultimately win the division, but I do believe you have to make them the preseason favorites.

I am not particularly strong on the Eagles. I do not believe they are a legit Super Bowl contender. I do not believe they match up well with the Packers, Falcons, or Saints. I think any of those three teams can knock them out of the NFC bracket in the tournament. If Eagles get there, they going to have to run one hell of a gauntlet to get there. I don't think they can do it. They just aren't that physical a football team.

This brings us to the New York Giants. The Giants are the leading candidates to upset the Eagle tea-party. However, they suffered several major set-backs in preseason: 3 major injuries including both their #1 and #2 picks. It sucks to be a Giant fan right now. A team that was certainly competitive now has some doubts. The Giants also have some issues surrounding changes on their OL, but so far that unit is looking pretty good. I predict the Giants will be 10-6 but lose the 6th seed to the Lions based on tie-breakers.

I believe that the Cowboys are rebuilding and not redecorating by moving the furniture around. Their changes on the offensive line have been profound, with 80% of their starters changing. Ultimately, the Cowboys won't be a highly competitive team this year.

This brings us to the subject of the Redskins. Before preseason began, I believed the Redskins were the most talent-less and dysfunctional organization in football. I made them my prohibitive favorites to win the Andrew Luck Bowl. I remember scoffing when I heard Joe Theisman denying this assertion on NFL Total Access. "He's a loyal hommer. Can't blame him for being blind to the facts", I though.

Well shut my mouth and call me a fool. The Redskins have been shockingly competitive in preseason, whupping the Steelers and coming within a hair's breath of beating the Ravens. That Raven game was the most entertaining dandy of the 2011 preseason. The Skins may lack a mountain of talent, but Mike Shanahan has gotten these dogs to get up on their hind legs and fight like pitbulls. That is some serious coaching! If he can get this motley crew to go 7-9 or 8-8, his genius as a coach will be re-confirmed and he will get my vote as NFL coach of the year.

NFC South

Welcome to the toughest and nastiest division in professional football. This is the division where 3 of the 4 residents are all talented contenders. Two of your top 3 prospects for the Super Bowl dwell here.

Last year the Falcons earned the #1 seed in the NFC, and they have gotten better. The big problem is that they have gotten better on offense and not defense. Many consider the Falcon defense a bit suspect and the Achilles heal of the football team. The Falcons obviously disagreed. They traded their entire draft for Julio Jones so they could assemble a trifecta of brilliant pass-catchers for QB Matt Ryan: Tony Gonzales, Roddy White and Julio Jones. Obviously, the Falcons believed they need more explosive offense, not more dominant defense.

We shall see if their hypothesis was correct. It shall be put to the test. Right now, I consider them a good bet to repeat as NFC South camp.

The Saints are a particular favorite of mine. I like these guys quite a bit, but I don't like the loss of Reggie Bush. Reggie was the Swiss Army knife that allowed this offense to be explosive. He also delivered on the special teams. I think this loss is going to hurt more than they think.

I love the acquisition of Heisman Trophy winner Mark Ingram. He was one of my favorite kids in the the 2011 draft. I wanted the Rams to take him, and I drafted him for my fantasy team. I would not have done that if I wasn't expecting good things from him. However, he is not a one-for-one drop-in replacement part for Reggie Bush. These are two different guys who do two different things. They are as different as Marshall Faulk was from Emitt Smith.

There is another factor to consider. When the Saints won the Super Bowl they featured a 3-4 defense with Darrin Sharper ball-hawking in the defensive backfield. Now they have a 4-3 defense without Sharper. Right now the defense is looking bigger, meaner, more physical and dominant than ever. We shall see if this holds true in the regular season. However, this is a big, big change. Don't over look the magnitude of this change.

I am very bullish on the Buc. I think they are loaded on offense. I think they have a clutch QB and three good receivers, a power runner, and a bunch of big offensive linemen. I believe they successfully completed a dominant defensive line in the 2011 draft.

If the Bucs were in the AFC or NFC West, they would have to be the favorites to win those divisions. Unfortunately, they are in the biggest, baddest, toughest division in the NFL. The Bucs biggest problem is the twin 800 pound gorillas sitting on top of them. This going to be a serious issue for them.

Given the power of the Lions and the Giants, I find it very difficult to pick the Bucs as the 6th seed in the tournament. It could happen, but both the Lions and the Giants would have to stumble. I don't see that happening. One might, but the other won't.

This brings up Carolina. Forget about it! You fucked up big-time in the draft. You just might win the Andrew Luck Bowl. You got three Godzillas in your division just waiting drop down on your head and go caca-doodle-do.

NFC West

As I have said before, I see the NFC West as a two-horse race between the Rams and the Cardinals.

Many experts have anointed my Rams as the class of the NFC West. We appreciate this, but it is not a done-deal just yet. My 2011 Rams feature a greatly-improved offensive line that was manhandling and abusing enemy defensive lines this preseason. Who knew Harvey Dahl could make such a big difference? We also have a greatly improved defensive line that features our #1 pick Robert Hall, and free-agent acquisition Justin Bannan. This is reason to celebrate. The game is won and lost in the trenches.

Over on the negative side of the fence, our receiver corp is no longer the worst in football... hopefully... but it still far from the best. We still lack big-time play makers and game changers. This will place a hard-cap on what we can do this season. We will find it difficult to upset superior opponents without game-breakers on offense.

We also have a vastly more difficult schedule than last year, but not as difficult as some presume. The NFC South was no cake-walk last season. Neither was the NFC North. Overall, if we can improve our record by 1 game, it will be a pretty good year.

I expect the Cardinals to be resurgent in 2011. Their first unit looked like dynamite against the Chargers in preseason. It looks to me like they are getting what they wanted out of the Kevin Kobb trade. He is hitting Larry Fitzgerald in the great-wide-open with intermediate and long passes. That is what they need offensively. Further, Beanie Wells is starting to show up strong on the radar. It's about time. I once picked him as my rookie of the year. Finally, Patrick Peterson is looking like an impact rookie. Did you see him jump that route and intercept Philip Rivers for a Pick-6? Rivers was pissed. Peterson is an exciting, exciting rookie.

It is going to be a very interesting and asymmetrical battle between the Rams and the Cardinals for the title.

What about the Seahawks? Forget about it! Stick a fork in it, their done. They let their franchise QB go, and they have nothing in hand to replace him. Do you remember Herm Edwards' Law? I am subtracting 4 victories from their 2010 record for the lack of a franchise QB. This puts the Seahawks at 3-13, and near the top of the draft. They may be intentionally tanking this season so they can win the Andrew Luck Bowl.

What about the 49ers? If you want to know who is at or near the top of my hot list for who was the most screwed by the lockout, the 49ers would probably be #2. The 49ers did play a bit better than I expected during this preseason, but this is a hard-pressed franchise right now. They are in the midst of a full-flush and clean of the coaching staff, a conversion to the West Coast Offense, Quarterback transition, and a deeply worn-out franchise running back. The defense lost it's heart and soul when Mike Singletary was fired. Call it 3-13 folks.

AFC North

The Ravens are my prohibitive favorite to win the AFC, not just the AFC North. I think it is Packers v Ravens in Super Bowl 46. I love the architecture of this team. I love their offense. I love their defense. I love their special teams. I love their head coach. They got one of the greatest GMs in the league, and he is a home-grown guy, raised inside the organization.

Throughout much of last year, the Ravens looked like the most powerful team in the NFL. They sputtered a bit down the stretch, ending with another disappointing loss to the Steelers. I don't think this will happen again this year.

Joe Flacco is seen as the key man by nearly everyone. This team will go as far as their QB's performance will allow them to go. Many site a lack of success in the final 2 minutes of clutch games as being Joe Flacco' s key weakness. They compare that to Ben Roethlisberger's tremendous success in the final 2 minutes of clutch games, and they bet against the Ravens.

Give Flacco a little chance here. He's one of the most over-criticized men in the league. I think he's going to do it. Some call him a front-runner, but I think he can front-run through the entire AFC this year.

Regarding the Steelers, I am going to stick with the statistical and historical tables that firmly teach us that the team that loses the Super Bowl does not make the playoffs the next year. Accordingly, the Steelers will not make the playoffs in 2011.

Steeler nation will complain bitterly that the Steelers are better organization than that, and they are showing new signs of explosive offense. I don't care. I am sticking with the probability tables, no matter what. I would remind you that the last time you won the Super Bowl, you did not make the playoffs the next year. Now you have to face the post-loss depression.

The Browns are rising football team, and the most likely to upset my playoff picture. I would make them my #7 seed and the first team to play their way in if somebody else should stumble. Mike Holmgren is turning that franchise around, but it might take one more year to reach the playoffs. They are looking dramatically better, though.

What about the Bengals? Forget about! This is a heavy rebuilding year. Stick a fork in, their done. Call it 3-13.

AFC East

I know you... I know what you are thinking! You are think the Patriots, the 8 time defending ESPN champions, will win the Super Bowl for a 9th straight season. Aren't you thinking that? I know you are.

Get off drugs! The Assemblies of God run a good detox program called Teen Challenge. It will help you to sober up.

In case you were wondering I am not a believer in the Patriot theory. The Patriots got to 14-2 last season through scheme, smoke and mirrors, and plain-old luck. How lucky they were to face the Packers without Aaron Rodgers? They almost lost that game anyhow. I was one of the few guys not surprised by their quick exit from the playoffs. One and done, bitch.

The fact of the matter was that the Patriots were a 10-6 class football team that somehow made it to 14-2 by a fluke. That was the flukiest outcome since the Rams went 13-3 in 2003. In case you didn't get the memo, the Patriot dynasty officially ended in 2007. That was it. That was all she wrote. Over and done with. No more Patriot dynasty, Buber.

They are a little bit better this year, but their arch-nemesis is also better this year... I think. The Patriots are still nothing to write home about in 2011. They will not be a major factor in the Super Bowl 46 picture. I think they get the 5th seed and lose in the first round to the #2 seed... which would be the Jets again.

This brings us to those frickin' Jets. I did not like some of their moves in this off-season, but the overall picture is improved. I didn't think Plaxico would do well in this environment, but so far so good. I think all systems are go for them to win their first Easter Division Title in quite some time.

What about the Dolphins and Bills? What about them? They are cannon fodder. Stick a fork in 'em, they are done.

AFC South

The AFC South is the most difficult call on the entire scoreboard. The Colts are great organization, but I see them on the cusp of a down-turn. Manning is recovering from neck surgery, and may miss the beginning of the season. If he does, they will lose every game they play without him, I assure you of that.

Furthermore, I don't like the Colts offensive and defensive lines this year. I done saw them get blowed out too many times in preseason to believe this group is ready for trench-warfare in 2011. I think both line units are suspect. That is a very untoward and foreboding sign of problems in the near future. I don't expect great things from the Colts in 2011.

Furthermore, I suspect Jim Tressell has been brought in as an heir-apparent waiting in the wings should Jim Caldwell lose favor due to adversity. I think Bill Polian has his backup plan in his hip pocket right now.

This brings us to the Texans, the heir apparent waiting in the wings. Folks, I love what I saw from their defense in this preseason. Wade Phillips is working some major-league magic in reviving this unit. He's doing it again, I am convinced of it.

Just sit back and imagine what this high-powered Texan offense will do if they have a #12 ranked defensive unit to make their scores stand up? Dude! They could do so much more! If the defense can terminate just 7 possessions a game without a score, the Texans should win a lot of games. Right now, I think they can go 11-5, and I think that might be enough to defeat a diminished Colt team.

What about the Jags and the Titans? I don't have much confidence in either. Both are going to be breaking in rookie QBs. The Titans are going through a full-scale rebuild right now. I expect both to finish low.

AFC West

Regrettably, we must now discuss the worst division in professional football, the AFC West. Regrettably, I must select the Chargers.

I want it to be understood that I have absolutely no faith or confidence in the Chargers. I mean zip, zero, ziltch, nil, nada, nothing in the way of confidence in the Chargers. I think they are dead meat in the playoffs. They will exit quietly with their tails between their legs, one and done.

Still, I have to pick them because there is nobody else to pick in the AFC West. I have looked at the other three teams and I see absolute dog shit piled on top of dog shit. I see a Chief team that looked plain terrible in preseason. They have regressed mightily. I see a Denver team that is still in the Titanic mess that Josh McDaniels put them in. It will take them a couple of years to dig out of this mess.

And then we have the Raiders. This is truly the most dysfunctional organization in professional football. I thought that might be the Redskins, but they are proving me wrong. Al Davis is in the 7th stage of dementia due to advancing Alzheimer's disease, and he won't take his hands of the wheel of the ship.

I am convinced that this team will continue to founder and crash on the rocks until the day Al gives up the ghost.

In the preseason, the Raiders looked absolutely terrible. They were worse than even the Kansas City Chiefs. The Raiders are the prohibitive favorite to win the Andrew Luck Bowl. This is probably the worst team in professional football. I think the Raiders finish 1-15 or 2-12.

Poor Andrew! I'm hurting for you kid, but take hope: Knowing, Al, he just might trade your pick to get a couple of unknown track stars.

Jamie Dukes and Philip Rivers: Opposites attract.

I'm going to start this blog in a somewhat strange way: With a tale about my dad. My dad has been divorced for about two years now, and recently he has been thinking about re-entering the market. Believe it or not, market conditions are pretty good for an old man.

Since I have been on an astrology kick lately, he asked me what sort of woman he aught to go after. My dad just happens to be a Sagittarius, so I told him that his strongest attraction would be to a Gemini woman. You see, Gemini and Sagittarius are 180 degree opposites. Geminis are born in late may (right now) and June. Sagittarians are born in late November and early December. They are half a year away from each other.

Opposites attract. Opposites have the most powerful attraction. Negatively charged magnets go after positively charged magnets. High Ph. goes after low Ph. Heat seeks cold. Air fills a vacuum. Negatively charged electrons orbit around positively charged protons. We're talking about physical laws here folks. There is some real science behind this theory folks.

Pop wasn't too pleased with that answer. He had recently had a bad experience with a Gemini woman he had high hopes for. The mere fact that he had had this experience and high hopes was proof positive of the theory, but he wasn't prepared to hear this. Of course, I understood him completely. I have suffered these disappointed with my opposite numbers as well.

A couple hours later, after grilling with some friends, the two of us are watching a corny but fun cult comedy called Highway to Hell (1991) brought to you by Stiller Clan (Jerry, Ben, Amy and mama Anne Meara). Suddenly, an actress named Pamela Gidley makes her entrance. My dad sits up sharply and has an instant synastry reaction. He immediately asks "Who's that girl!" I whup out my trusty Thunderbolt and look her up on the imdb.com app.

I immediately crack up laughing "Guess what, Pop? You just reacted big-time to a Gemini woman. Pamela Gidley was born June 11, 1965 in Methuen, Mass." He looked a little disconcerted. Maybe the magic works after all?

Now let's move on to the NFL Network. Rich Eisen asks Jamie Dukes and Warren Sapp who should be favored to win the AFC West in 2011... presuming there is a 2011.

[Incidentally, Dukes is a Gemini and Sapp is a Sagittarius. They work very well together despite being on opposite sides of the line and the Zodiac.]

Immeidately, Dukes declares the San Diego Chargers. I immediately bust up laughing. Dukes is a broken record on this subject. Rich Eisen challenges him sharply, asking Dukes to justify his statement. Like me, Rich Eisen just doesn't believe in the Chargers anymore. I don't know how you can believe in the Chargers. I think they are ripe for the wheels to fall off in 2011. If you ask me, they are clearly on the downslope.

Dukes centers his faith in the Chargers upon the very person of Christ Jesus... er... Philip Rivers. Philip Rivers is the marquee player and the only franchise QB in that entire division. Philip Rivers is the guarantor of the Chargers' supremacy in the AFC West. Rich wasn't buying it. Neither was I.

Why is Jamie Dukes to irrefutably sold on Philip Rivers that he believes the guy can single-handedly win the AFC West? Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Jamie Dukes was born on June 14, 1964 and Philip Rivers was born on December 8, 1981. Jamie is a Gemini and Philip is a Sagittarius. There is a powerful oppositional affinity there folks.

Now, Philip has plenty of merit. This guy consistently ranks as one of the top passers in the league. He's a hell of a good leader too. Dukes isn't just pissing in the wind when he says this is a marquee QB. However, most of the rest of us are not so enamored with the guy that we think he can do it all by himself as the rest of the franchise falls down around his ears. Jamie is and does.

So are you saying that Jamie Dukes's predictions for the Chargers is based entirely on an irrational confidence in Philip Rivers born out of oppositional affinity? Yep, that's precisely what I am saying. It's completely irrational to believe Philip Rivers can win the AFC West single handed. Jamie thinks Philip can win it single-handed due to oppositional affinity.

I, too, know the problems of oppositional affinity. When the Steelers called the Rams trying to deal Ben Roethlisberger, I was just about ready to listen to that deal. Ben just happens to be a Pisces and I happen to be a Virgo.

Several times during this draft season, I stiffled myself as I was preparing to sing the praises of Christian Ponder. He happens to be a Pisces also. I still think Ponder can turn into a heck of a good QB, but as I write that line, I am a little concerned that I may be biased due to oppositional affinity. I also happened to be the guy who spear-headed the Draft Trent Dilfer campaign in St. Louis back in 1994. Yep, Trent is not just from my home-town college, he's also a Pisces.

Oppositional affinity is powerful thing folks. This is nothing to be trifled with or dismissed easily. Nobody will excite, disappoint, overjoy, or infuriate you more than your opposite number from around the other side of the year. They get under you skin big time.

Just ask Terry Bradshaw why Lynn Swann was his favorite receiver when he had John Stallworth on the other side.