The Greatest Show on Turf

Many will complain that I should not put the Greatest Show on Turf in my series covering the NFL's greatest all-time teams. They will protest that I am being a homer. Don't do that until I skip the Patriots. Then you can call me a homer.

As we have heard many times, and many more this past weekend, the Greatest Show on Turf was probably the greatest offense the NFL has ever seen. It's the only offense to score more than 500 points in 3 consecutive seasons. Although it only resulted one world championship, we did make it to two Super Bowls. We should have won that second one.

Cheating bastards...

What was the secret behind that amazing and astounding chemistry? How could they be that dynamic? Well, why don't you just have a good look at the general synastry picture here. I know my Pentecostal brethern Kurt Warner and Issac Bruce would not approve of this analysis, but let's set that aside for the moment.

Look at the number of key players who are water signs:

1. Kurt Warner (Cancer)
2. Marshall Faulk (Pisces)
3. Issac Bruce (Scorpio)
4. Ricky Proehl (Pisces)
5. Orlando Pace (Scorpio)

Let's not forget about Dick Vermeil who is also a Scorpio. What about the rest? Well, Roland Williams, our much forgotten Tight End, is a Taurus. He goes great with everybody.

The most interesting fact about this unit is that Az-Zahir Hakim and Torry Holt are both Geminis, and they both had tremendous chemistry with Kurt Warner.

Sirus 1.1 says Kurt and Torry are totally compatible. Consider the following numbers.

1. Similarity of Interests and Temperament: 257

2. Mutual Success and High Achievement: 103

3. Problem Solving, Communication, and Mutual Understanding: 164

4. Mutual Kindness, Friendliness, Pleasantness, and Peace: 119

5. Aggressiveness, Competition, Power, Success, or Violence: 0

6. Adventurousness, Surprises, Disturbances: 172

7. Shared Creativity, Imagination, and Inspiration: 92

The story with Az Hakim is pretty good, too.

1. Similarity of Interests and Temperament: 371

2. Mutual Success and High Achievement: 31

3. Problem Solving, Communication, and Mutual Understanding: 9

4. Mutual Kindness, Friendliness, Pleasantness, and Peace: 192

5. Aggressiveness, Competition, Power, Success, or Violence: 39

6. Adventurousness, Surprises, Disturbances: 122

7. Shared Creativity, Imagination, and Inspiration: 36

What is the key to Kurt's outstanding chemistry with Gemini? First, Water and Air can mix with some difficulty. Second, Kurt is a 1st day Cancer. He was born right on the edge of Gemini. Finally, Kurt has a considerable amount of Air in his chart.

The offensive line is a remarkable mixture when you look at it. Gruttadauria and Nutten are 180 degree opposites, and you know the story about opposites. They attract and complement one another tremendously. Likewise, Fred Miller and Adam Timmerman are 180 degree opposites. Orlando was actually the odd man out on this unit, although he is all the more compatible with everyone else on the team.

Consider Coach Dick Vermeil (Scorpio) and Mike Martz (Taurus). They too are 180 degree opposites, and there was incredible dynamism between them. We were never the same after we lost Coach Vermeil. It was when these two were together that we had the best of the motivational disciplinarian and the mad scientist. Incidentally, both are super-compatible with their skill position players.

One more point: Martz (Taurus) is side-by-side with Hakim (Gemini) and Holt (Gemini) in spring time. This usually leads to good relations.

One of these days I am going to write a piece about what 1999 meant to me. It's crazy. It's so crazy, I still wonder if some of you will believe me. This is why I hesitate to blog about it.

Welcome back, Nolan Cromwell

In move sure to prove how much influence and sway I have over the organization, the Rams hired Nolan Cromwell to coach our Wide Receivers yesterday. Of course, I am glad we have Nolan back, and I wish him nothing but the very best of good luck in working with our razor thin talent at the position. Cromwell has always been an excellent man.

However, I am disapointed for Issac Bruce. I felt he was natural fit. We had marvelous results with Henry Ellard, and we never should have let him go. Issac would have walked in the footsteps of Henry for the second time. I felt Issac's second succession would lead to similar excellent results.

Perhaps we can suit Issac up for one season. God knows we can use him.

To make Nolan successful this time around, we are going to have to seriously upgrade our talent at the Wide Receiver position. Laurent Robinson was showing signs in his foreshortened tour of duty last season. We hope he can come back from injury. Donnie Avery took two steps back and perhaps two or three steps forward last season. We are uncertain of his progress. It was a very up and down affair in 2009 for Avery. I was upset by the drops and fumbles, but we need to remember he was our only weapon last season. He drew tough double coverage at all times because defenses needed to worry about no one else. I personally believe he is destined to be the #2 receiver behind a big-shot #1 receiver we do not yet have on the roster.

God knows I am praying for a collective bargaining agreement in the next 17 days so we can acquire Brandon Marshall from the Denver Broncos. I would chase him all day long in free agency with big money. Marshall is everything you want and more from a killer #1 receiver. He would take all the pressure in the world off of Donnie Avery and Laurent. They would be able to prosper in the shade of his tall shadow. Marshall and Avery would make a very nice thunder and lightning combo. They would pose some difficulties for defensive coordinators in 2010. DCs in 2009 had no difficulties to consider--save Steven Jackson--when playing the Rams.

Finally, acquiring Dexter McCluster in the 3rd around is an absolute must. I would use McCluster in precisely the same way Mad Mike Martz intends to use Devon Hester. I would line Dexter up in the Slot receiver position and try to construct a mis-match between him and a safety or outside linebacker. He'll shake either coverage easily.

To make either Michael Vick or Tim Tebow successful in both the near and the long terms, serious upgrades at the Wide Receiver position are in order.

Nolan Cromwell and Issac Bruce

So, rumors are swirling about a rejiggering of the Rams coaching staff. I am skeptical. There is no doubt that WR coach Charile Baggett has departed for Tennessee. He couldn't take our pure lack of talent at the position. He must be replaced. This does not constitute rejiggering though. If we wanted to really fix something, we would start by firing Pat Shurmer and dumping the West Coast Offense. This would constitute a sizable first step in the right direction.

Getting Mike Leach would be huge.

But returning to the issue at hand, we need a new WR coach. Two named are being bandied about, and they are big names if you are a Ram fan. The first is none other the Issac Bruce, the 2nd all-time leading receiver after that guy named Jerry Rice. He is also a charter member of the Greatest Show on Turf. You could hardly ask for a better receiver to coach receivers. The other name is Nolan Cromwell. You youngins may not know that name so let me coach you up.

Nolan Cromwell was a QB at Kansas where they ran it out of the Wishbone. The Rams drafted him in 1977, and we moved him to Free Safety, where he QB'd our defense for years. He retired after 1987... The last strike year. I don't want to go into that. He is one of the unsung heros of Ram history. He was also our field goal holder for years and years. We frequently ran trickerations with Cromwell running or throwing the football. He was elected to four ProBowls and should have had more. He was an amazing athlete. Many do not know that Cromwell dropped a Pick-6 interception in SB14 that might well have clinched the game for the Rams.

It seems that Cromwell has been quite a Renaissance man in his after-life as a coach. He has been a special teams coach with the Rams and Packers. He coached receivers in Seattle. He has been the offensive coordinator of Texas A&M for the past 4 years. Let's remember that he was an option QB and defensive back as a player.

Choosing between these two guys is like choosing between your mother and your father. Its brutal. I'll spit it out: I do have to say that I think Issac is the better qualified guy to coach our receivers. You can hardly find a more skilled receiver in NFL history than Bruce. I believe he can pass it on. He is a good character guy also. He always conducted himself impeccably. We want and we need him back.

Is there another slot where we can make a place for Cromwell? I'll tell you this: I wouldn't mind making him the OC. It would shake things up plenty. I feel strange making a former defensive back and wishbone QB our coordinator. Still, we cannot do worse than we did last season. I need to study Cromwell's offensive philosophy, and see what he has been up to at Texas A&M these past 4 years.