Sunday, January 16, 2011

My Super Bowl Predictions... Shot to hell in one day


Day of upsets

As far as I am concerned, this Saturday was just like last Saturday: Another day of upsets. Some will complain that it just ain't so, but this is the way I am taking it.

Ravens blow it in a choaker
As you know, the Pittsburgh Steelers defeated the Baltimore Ravens 31-24 yesterday in a pretty massive come-from-behind victory. When the Ravens took a 21-7 lead, I knew it was over. This was going to be a laugher, and I was astonished by how easy the Ravens were making it look.

Not so fast. The Ravens would blow it. You can't tell me this one doesn't smart like hell in the Baltimore locker room. The Ravens had the victory in the bag. They fucked it up. You let them off the hook.

Why is this an upset? Because the Ravens were looking like the most powerful team in the AFC throughout much of the 2010 season, that's why. Many of us considered the Steelers absurdly lucky to escape with the division title this year. This is the reason why Ben Roethlisberger gave us that post-game speech about how proud he was that the Steelers proved themselves to be the true AFC North champions yesterday.

Packers pack fudge
As you also know, the #6 seed in the NFC took down the #1 seed in the NFC last night. Why is that an upset? Whenever the 6 seed takes out the 1 seed, we usually consider that an upset.

Some would protest that designation, as the Packers are considered--by many--to be the most dangerous team in the playoffs. This is the team you don't want to play. They looked every inch of that designation and some last night.

The Green Bay Packers didn't just beat the Falcons. They took the little shavers down to the woodshed and sharpened them up with a leather strop. That was a damn ugly ass-whipping to take in front of your home crowd.

What has happened to my Super Bowl?
For those who don't remember, I was (more or less) expecting the Ravens to meet the Falcons in the Super Bowl. I didn't make playoff predictions before this tournament began because I had a heavy feeling that this is a fluke year.

This isn't entirely a disaster for me, as I had the Packers in Pre-Season. I lost confidence in them as their casualty list waxed long.

Still, I'm warning you... Any goat can climb to the top of the mount this season. Don't be too confident in any of your predictions right now. This is a fluke year.

All I can say is this: You Packers better win the whole fucking enchilada, or I am going to be pissed as hell at you. It's fine if you guys win it, but if... per chance... you or the consequence of your actions allow the Steelers to win their 7th championship, I'm going to be really fucking pissed at you.

The nightmare after the upsets
So I go to bed last night around 2:00am, well after the upsets are over, and I have an unbelievably vivid dream. It wasn't a Vivid dream. It was a vivid dream.

I dreamt I was watching the Vikings play the 49ers in Candlestick in a divisional playoff round. The 49ers were the heavy favorite. The Vikings were the 4th seed North champs. Somehow, the Vikings pulled off a major upset in a heart-attack thriller. The Vikings were dancing off the field when the clock hit zero. It was bedlam for the Vikings.

I would have thought this was a rewind to the 1980s, except for the fact that it was Jared Allen doing all the celebrating and the post-game interviews. This victory meant that the Vikings would return home to host the NFC Championship game, in a Cardinal-type scenario.

This dream makes no sense. Neither the 49ers nor the Vikings made the tournament this year. Neither looks likely next season. Nevertheless, this dream scares me. I'm going to have to watch these two teams closely in the off season. This omen does not bode well for my Rams. If the 49ers were to be the #2 seed in the 2011 tournament, this would necessarily indicate that (1) my Rams didn't win the division, and (2) Jim Harbaugh will do a tremendous job pulling them up off the carpet.