Virgo-Pisces Alliance No.227: Plotting the perfect pasta dish

Oh how lost is my FoodNetwork!  As you know, football season has ended.  This means that there is only one thing to watch on the old HDTV, and we ain't talking about basketball.  We're talking about cooking shows.  Food season begins the second that football season ends.

Unfortunately, the Food Network has rolled over and died in the past year.  I didn't mind much last year, as I was undergoing rapid weight loss after gastric bypass.  This year, the state of the Food Network has become insufferable.

Why?  Let me enumerate the reasons why!

1. The Food Network is no longer in the teaching business.
2. The good old teachers such as Alton Brown, Tyler Florence, and Giada DiLaurentis have a minimal presence on the Food Network these days.
3. It seems that the Cooking Channel, in low-def only, has now become the haunt of all those who would like to improve our culinary knowledge and skills.  Better low-def than nothing, but the Cooking Channel really should make the leap to high-def soon.
4. The Food Network has gone over to the reality show dogs.  Am I alone here when I say that there is simply nothing worse than these stupid game-shows masquerading as reality shows?  Reality shows were bad enough, but now that they have gamed them, these shows are even worse.  Unfortunately, this absolute rubbish is the prime-time substance of the Food Network.  I am utterly  disgusted beyond words.  I cannot pour enough scorn and venom on this programming strategy.
5. Alton Brown doesn't seem to be cranking out any more episodes of Good Eats.
6. Tyler Florence is busy running a restaurant in Mill Valley California, recharging his culinary batteries, according most insider reports.  He's not doing any new episodes of Tyler's Ultimate.
7. Only Michael Symon is cranking out good teaching programming at this point, and only for the Cooking Channel.  He has never done a true teaching program in HD.

Nevertheless, it is quite clear that Michael Symon has slid right into the spot formerly occupied by Tyler Florence.  Astrologically, this is to be expected.  Tyler is a Pisces.  Michael is a Virgo.  These are 180 degree opposites, but more alike and complementary than you would ever expect at first glance.  The demographic Tyler appealed to is exactly the same demographic Michael Symon will appeal to.  You would expect their audience test scores to be very similar.

Is there anything more than that?  Well, I am certainly glad you asked me that question.  If you can, view the following episodes of Tyler's Ultimate and Symon's Suppers back to back, and tell me you don't see any resemblance in the food or meal plan.

1. Tyler's Ultimate Sunday Gravy, first aired on 2/27/2010
2. Symon's Suppers Childhood Favorites, first aired on 2/9/2012

In episode 1, Tyler is preparing a spaghetti  meal with pork shoulder, ribs and meat balls.  He braises these items in a sauce very similar to the base sauce for Bolognese.  In episode two, Michael Symon is cooking with his mother and father.  He prepares a spaghetti meal with ribs and meat balls in a base sauce very similar to Bolognese.  

Michael Symon proceeds from the statement that this is his mama's recipe, and his favorite from childhood.  You can't help but feel a conversation is taking place.  You cannot help but feel that Michael Symon is developing a dialectical culinary conversation with Tyler.  Obviously, these two gravies are vastly more similar than dis-similar.

Evidently, Mike's mom didn't use pork shoulder.  Too bad... the pork shoulder looked sensational.  I would not leave out the pork shoulder.  Also, Symon's use of Ricotta cheese in the meat balls is critical.  Tyler did not use Ricotta in his meatballs.  I would not leave out the Ricotta.  I am sure those meatballs were sensational.

Symon also braises with a cheese rind.  That is a sensational trick I learned from an Italian gent, and it works like crazy.

If that is not enough for you, then consider the following pair of episodes:

1. Tyler's Ultimate Winter Comfort Food, first aired 1/17/2007
2. Symon's Suppers Sunday Suppers, first aired 2/2/2012

In episode #1, Tyler prepares Tagliatelle Bolognese.  In episode #2, Michael prepares Tagliatelle Bolognese.  The key difference is that Tyler uses beef and pork with some panchetta.  He finishes with some Italian Parsley.  Michael Symon used some sensational Lamb shoulder and finishes with Mint.

Symon also reduces his sauce to a chunky thickness, he then loosens the reduction with pasta water.  I do this myself.  You concentrate the sauce as much as possible to a paste, then you re-hydrate with that starchy and salty pasta water.  This greatly enhances the flavor of the sauce.

You can't help but feel a conversation is taking place.  You cannot help but feel that Michael Symon is developing a dialectical culinary conversation with Tyler.  It is a fascinating conversation as well... At least from my perspective.

Personally, I would mix Pork and Lamb, use Black-forrest smoked bacon, and finish with Mint.  I would also home-brew my own fresh Tagliatelle pasta.  In fact, I just decided I am going to do this tonight.  Tonight is the night.

I am shocked Michael Symon didn't do his own fresh pasta in this particular episode.  I have seen him do this a hundred times before.  I got my vacuum-sealer stunt from him. That is when I really took my own home-pasta to the next level.  

Returning to the ultimate home gravy, for just one moment, I am going to have to do this recipe soon, but I won't do it until I have a bunch of people to help me eat it.  This stuff looks just too precious to waste.  It also is intended to be shared.  I know that just by taking one look at it.

A quick shout out to Tyler:  We need you to come back, man!  The Food Network just ain't the same without you.  We need you to do some new material, and we need Michael Symon to do his first HD teaching show.  Both shows needs to go into a prime-time slot, back to back.

I promise you, oh managers of the Food Network, that you will dominate that time slot if you will put this deal together.  Trust me.

Karina Smirnoff loves Tim Tebow

According to the New York Daily News, Karina Smirnoff wants to dance with Tim Tebow.  She says Tebow would be a worthy successor to the NFL's panoply of former contestants on Dancing with the Stars.  This includes such super-luminaries as Emmitt Smith, Jerry Rice, Kurt Warner, Hines Ward, Warren Sapp, Jason Taylor, and Lawrence Taylor.

You can read about it here.

Karina took it a bit further than that. She declared that all she wants for her birthday is to see Tim Tebow dance on Dancing with the Stars.  Incidentally, her birthday is 1/2/1978.  She just turned 34.

I have to warn you my son, Karina has big a thing for you.  You may like her as well.  My computer indicates that the two of you have some pretty hot synastry.  This is despite the fact that she is a Capricorn and you are a Leo.  It won't be that pleasant, but there is some serious heat there.

Based on these numbers, it's pretty clear that she intends to cougar you.  As a Virgo guy, I extend to you my sincerest envy.  I would jump on Karina Smirnoff without one instant of hesitation.  But this is to be expected.  I am a Virgo guy, and she is a Capricorn lady.  That's a natural.  Furthermore, she's a perfect trine (120 degrees) away from me.  That's the best of all angles.

Capricorn and Leo?  Not the most normal match up.  It's a 150 degree angle known as the inconjunct.  This means you two have nothing in common.    Still, you two have some lovely scores.  Much better than those of Katie Perry.

Well son, you may be unfamiliar with this breed of woman, so let me give you the scouting report.  Don't under-estimate the power, aggression and strategic cunning of the Capricorn woman.  Capricorn is a femme earth sign, but it is the greatest of the cardinal leadership signs.  These are super-disciplined, driven competitors, who work relentlessly to get what they want.  They are accustomed to winning.

You need to think about a female version of Don Shula, Chuck Noll, Sean Payton, Jim and John Harbaugh. All those guys are Capricorn coaches.  If she coaches you, she will use this style and approach.

Believe me, I would accept coaching from a woman like this, but I am a natural-born sucker for a Capricorn woman.

Still, it would be best for you to let your ribs heal up and spend every waking moment doing quarterback drills with John Elway.  It would be ill-advised to allow this delicious, delectable, scrumptious, delightful temptress to divert your attentions from your primary mission this off season.

Welcome back to Capricorn time

So, last night was the Winter Solstice; the longest night of the year (in the Northern hemisphere) and the shortest day.  It is also the official end of Fall and the beginning of winter.  The Sun migrated into Capricorn something like 6 hours ago (according to the Tropical Zodiac, and from a geocentric perspective), so we are now officially back on earth time.  Home again, home again, jiggity-jig.

If you prefer the real skymap, we are entering Sagittarius time.  That would still work fine for me, because the real skymap makes me a Leo.  I am still entering my home element, no matter what.  You see, it's the angle, even more than the sign or the element.  I rejected that theory for a long time, but not now.

'Tis the season why all those Christmas bundles of joy for every Virgo boy are being born.  Virgo and Capricorn are a notorious match-up; perhaps even the most notorious of all synastry match-ups.  Do yourself a favor and google search "Capricorn Virgo Synastry" or "Virgo Capricorn Synastry".  You'll get about 10,000 pages celebrating these two as one of the best matches possible.

My cousin Justin would agree.  He happens to be a Capricorn guy married to a Virgo girl.  I think it has been 12 or 13 years already...

This doesn't naturally imply that all Capricorns are good for all Virgos, or vise-versa.  This would make us all perpetually confused, and we would probably kill each other.  This would subvert the key bedrock-partnership upon which human society is based.  However, you can rest assured that there is more than one ideal Capricorn partner for each Virgo, and vise-versa.

Just make sure no evil scorpions get in the way...

In any case, I thought I would share one of my favorite pieces of Astrological art with you.  This little piece by Kagaya depicts Capricorn and Virgo going out for a little swim in the ocean together.  It's extremely girly in nature, but it is nice to know that there are female romantics out there with some 3d modeling and rendering skills.  This is a lovely piece of work.

Why Trent Richardson will win the Heisman tonight

A quick look at the last 15 Heisman trophy winners reveals a bunch of clear-cut patterns. Before generalizing, let's look at the empirical data:

Num	Year	Name	School	Position	Class	Points
1	1996	Danny Wuerffel	Florida	QB	Sr	1,363
2	1997	Charles Woodson	Michigan	CB	Jr	1,815
3	1998	Ricky Williams	Texas	RB	Sr	2,355
4	1999	Ron Dayne	Wisconsin	RB	Sr	2,042
5	2000	Chris Weinke	Florida State	QB	Sr	1,628
6	2001	Eric Crouch	Nebrska	QB	Sr	770
7	2002	Carson Palmer	USC	QB	Sr	1,328
8	2003	Jason White	Oklahoma	QB	Jr	1,481
9	2004	Matt Leinart	USC	QB	jr	1,325
10	2005	Reggie Bush	USC	RB	Jr	2,541
11	2006	Troy Smith	Ohio State	QB	Sr	2,540
12	2007	Tim Tebow	Florida	QB	Soph	1,957
13	2008	Sam Bradford	Oklahoma	QB	Soph	1,726
14	2009	Mark Ingram	Alabama	RB	Soph	1,304
15	2010	Cam Newton	Auburn	QB	Jr	2,263

After carefully reviewing this data, let's generalize:

1. You have to play offense. Even Charles Woodson played WR and caught passes from Tom Brady at Michigan. He would openly tell you that he never would have won the award if didn't play offense.
2. You must come from a major, major brand-name college to win the award. Guys from Fresno State and Alcorn State don't win the Heisman. It doesn't matter if they go on to become #1 and #3 overall picks in the NFL Draft. You don't win the Heisman if you are from a non-Fortune 25 program.
3. Your perennial top 25 program better be playing for the national championship, or you are not going to win the Heisman. There are a few exceptions on this list, but very few. Charles Woodson, in particular, won the award because he was Michigan's clear-cut MVP in the year they won the Championship. Tim Tebow is a major exception, but he was in-between two national championships at the time. He was also the clear-cut MVP of that program.
4. You better be the MVP of that #1 or #2 ranked team, or you are not going to win the Heisman. Just about every name on that list is the clear-cut MVP of his program.
5. You had better be a QB or an RB, or you are not going to win the award. Charles Woodson is the only exception to this rule, but he is the most exceptional winner of all-time, and everybody knows it.

As I stated in my last blog entry, Trent Richardson is the only guy who fits the suit. Nobody else on the list of contenders fits the suit. Ergo Richardson must be the projected winner of the award.

I have no idea why odds-makers have made Robert Griffin III the favorite to win the award. I guess this is because Las Vegas was built on losers, not on winners. The objective of the handicapper is not to pick the winner, but to trick you into betting on the loser. As far as I am concerned, Robert Griffin is an instant replay of the Steve McNair story. Nobody put up more impressive numbers than McNair. McNair went on to become the #3 pick in the draft. He did not win the Heisman.

Is Baylor really that kind of a small-time program? Compared to Alabama? Absolutely! No doubt about it. Baylor is not a perennial top 25 program. Quite frankly, they aren't even close. Baylor is not playing for the national title this year. Quite frankly, they aren't even close. Robert Griffin has two major strikes against him. Trent Richardson does not.

My buddy Rico, who happens to be a Libra, objected to this line of reasoning. He declared that this just wasn't fair. Such a statement would indicate that

1. Defensive players & lineman can't win the award
2. Kids from small schools can't win the award
3. Great performers who aren't the MVP of their squad can't win.
4. You win because of your program, not your own merits.

Yes, that is absolutely correct. That is what it is. These facts are clearly evident in the data. This is the empirical fact.

"That just isn't fair!" I ain't saying it's fair. I'm saying this is the fact of the matter.

My friends, this is a moment for an object lesson in Astrology. Rico is a Libra. Contrary to popular notions, Virgo is not the great perfectionist of the Zodiac. Libra is. Like all earth signs, we Virgos are concrete, pragmatic, factual, logical, evidence-based critters. We reason from the material facts to the conclusion, not from an abstract notion of what is fair or lovely or beautiful or nice to an idealized notion of perfect reality.

The air-critters go from the abstract vision of what is fair, lovely, beautiful, nice, and well-balanced to an idealized notion of what should be. They do this like crazy. Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius all do this on a routine basis. None more than Libra. This is one of the reasons why earth and air people don't communicate well. Their reasoning methodologies are just too different.

Colin Cowherd is famous for saying "Fair doesn't exist. It's not a part of real life. Get over it." You can hear the screams of air people as he says that. You can hear a Virgo like me chuckling, because I know the air people are screaming. It should be noted that Cowherd is a major college football fan, and also a Capricorn brother. That means he's an earth boy, like me. Capricorns are concrete, pragmatic, factual, evidence-based critters also.

The truth is where the evidence leads us, not where we would like it to be. Too bad, really. Life sucks in the real world, then you die.

One interesting fact: Charles Woodson happens to be a Libra, and he broke a couple of the empirical patterns. Not bad... Interesting.

Rihanna is chosen by Esquire as the Sexist Woman Alive 2011

Hard to believe it has already been a year since Esquire Magazine declared Minka Kelly to be the Sexist Woman Alive (2010).  I guess it has been.

I blogged on the subject back in March of this year.  I have a pretty massive set of synastry scores vs. Ms. Kelly, according to Sirus 1.1.  I wouldn't care to deny that either.  It's not unusual for Virgos and Cancers to have a thing for each other.  It happens every day.  It is considered a 5 star match-up.

I have a strong hunch that this Esquire feature must be run by a 1966 Virgo born in close proximity to me.  He just went and selected another water-clan female who I have fairly substantial scores with.  This time it is the notorious, even infamous, Rihanna.

Rihanna is 23 year old woman born February 20th, 1988 in Saint Michael, Barbados.  She is a Pisces female if there ever was one.  For the record, my Synastry scores versus Rihanna are as follows:


 1. Romantic and Sexual Attraction:  167
 2. Similarity of Interests and Temperament:  171
 3. Mutual Success and High Achievement:  25
 4. Problem Solving, Communication, and Mutual Understanding:  113
 5. Mutual Kindness, Friendliness, Pleasantness, and Peace:  46
 6. Aggressiveness, Competition, Power, Success, or Violence:  163
 7. Adventurousness, Surprises, Disturbances:  53
 8. Shared Creativity, Imagination, and Inspiration:  128

As always, and for the record, any score above 150 is considered extremely strong.

Frankly the line-up of planets is more favorable than the scores indicate.  It would be difficult for a test-blinded Astrologer to justify how low these scores are.  Her Moon is in Aries, conjuncted with mine.  Her Mars is located at 28 degrees Sagittarius, which forms a nearly perfect Trine with my Venus at 22 degrees Leo.  My Mars is located at 5 degrees Leo, forming a near perfect Trine with her Venus at 13 degrees Aries.  It is a criss-cross Mars-Venus Trine situation.  Fire, fire, fire baby!  The exception is the Sun sign, in which case we have an opposition, the most powerful angle for attraction.

It's hard to justify the score of 167.  Am I disputing this score?  In this case, the answer is no.  I am comfortable with the verdict of 167.  I wouldn't care to move it higher.  I might want to move it lower, but that might be a dishonest move.

Frankly, those scores pale in comparison to Minka Kelly's.  For the record, you can see those scores here. Rihanna's scores can't hold a candle to those of the theoretically perfect Pisces female born 3/12/1986.

To say that I am ambivalent about Rihanna would be the understatement of the century.  I have spoken many times about the love-hate-love ambivalence astrological opposites experience toward one another.  This is certainly one of those cases for me.

On the positive side, I have to admit that I love Rihanna's music.  It is a guilty pleasure for a Heavy Metalist like me.  I can't seem to make it through the day without listening to Rude Boy at least 10 times.  This is probably my favorite song.  That may be an understatement.  I am steadily wearing out the CD in my car stereo.  I am playing it to death.  For the record here is that video:



On the negative side, you will never find a Pisces girl at her naughty, nasty, bad worst like this one is.  Consider some quotation from the Esquire article declaring Rihanna the Sexist Woman Alive (2011).

She grabs her own radiant ass--she handles it, offers it--like it's a rump roast.  She squats and spreads her legs, settles a hand between them, where it stays. Caresses her breasts.  She masturbates a dancer with the help of cane.  She pretends to go down on the keyboardist.
Rihanna doesn't really dance... Altogether it amounts to choreographed oozing.
She picks a member of the audience to have simulated sex with.  She guides the subject over to the platform in the middle of the stage.  She commands the subject to lie back.  She straddles the subject.  She grinds.  This part is not simulated.
... She is the indisputable champion of carnal pop.  At this moment, in this room, she is the essence of Fuck.

This dude is not going to get high marks for his prose poetry, but he does capture the essence of the phenomenon.  She is the next closest thing to a Porn Queen dancing at a strip joint.  Like I said a moment ago:  This is a Pisces woman at her naughty, nasty, bad worst.

As reserved, wholesome, conservative, and retrained as a Virgo woman is, that's how exhibitionist, dissolute, sensual and carnal a Pisces woman is going to be.  It is a perfect Matter-Antimatter dichotomy.

Grant that this is a relatively extreme case, but it is hyperbole that makes a very fine point.

I still find it bizarre and offensive that we polar opposites attract one another as powerfully as we do, but I cannot deny that we do.  Perhaps it is because we Virgos are not quite as wholesome as we pretend to be, and the Pisces are not quite the sensual party animals they pretend to be.  Perhaps we are just trying to balance-out by combining our strengths.  I don't know...

Ben Roethlisberger (a Pisces) was reportedly relieved to be busted by the Comish (who is himself a Pisces guy) because it relieved him of the obligation of being BIG BEN:  The hardest drinking, rootenist-tootenist, most carnal bad-boy the world has ever known.  He said he got caught up in an image he was never comfortable with, and this reputation forced him into things he was never comfortable with.

You have to wonder if Rihanna isn't in exactly the same spot Ben Roethisberger was at this point in her career.  Perhaps she isn't quite the carnal monstrosity she pretends to be, but she is caught in a game of "Can you top this!"

Maybe not.  Oh well, it was just a thought.

The gregarious Shaq, the aloof Kobe

If you live in Los Angeles, and listen to any sports radio at all, during the past 24 hours you have heard nothing but re-visitations of the historical divorce between Shaq an Kobe that went down after three consecutive championships. There is plenty of this on ESPN also.

Why now?  Why are we revisiting this sad turn of events at this moment in history?  What has occasioned this? Shaq has published a volume of his memoirs in the immediate aftermath of his retirement.  These are his first reflections on his life and career at this pivotal life-moment.  The notorious scandal-site DeadSpin.com got hold of it, and published a fairly sensational clipping that asserted the thesis that Kobe's sexual assault charge destroyed the Lakers (for a time).

In Los Angeles, this is like spilling a gas truck and tossing a lit flair.

Shaq and his ghost writer have been quick to try to compensate for the spin, declaring that this is a fairly sensationalistic interpretation of the book.  Shaq really does have a fondness for Kobe, and it might be true coming back in the other direction also.

There are a bunch of other ancillary issues in this famous divorce, but we won't go there.  Rather than recount this litany of crimes, I only want to comment on the nature, character and flavor of this relationship between Kobe and Shaq.

Shaquille O'Neal was born March 6th, 1972, the exact same day as my buddy and co-worker Tabish. Kobe Bryant was born August 23, 1978.  Kobe is about 6.5 years younger than Shaq.

I hate to break this to you doubters, and it will sound just like The Fish that Saved Pittsburgh, but this is another chapter in the history of the Virgo-Pisces alliance.  Shaq is a Pisces, and Kobe is a Virgo.  It should be noted that Phil Jackson is also a September 17th Virgo.  This story resembles the one found in the second half of the 1970s in the story of the Pittsburgh Steelers.  It was a rocky-road, at times, but you cannot deny the incredible success they had when working together.

I have listened to 4 or 5 hours of talk about this book now.  I have heard many interesting quotations.  Some of them were fairly long.  Every commentator on sports talk radio is reading this book on the air like radio preachers reading the Bible.  I have been repeatedly struck by how much this reminds me of the bad splits between me and few of my Pisces buddies in life.  It also reminds me of my relationship with my brother, who also happens to be a Pisces.

In short, it seems to me that Kobe and Shaq had a classic Virgo-Pisces relationship.  They had all of the success, complex contrasts, and bad moments that are typical in this relationship.  The phrase I keep hearing over and over again is "the gregarious Shaq, the aloof Kobe".  That is so Pisces-Virgo it ain't even funny.  The fact that the media has seized upon this description as the final summary almost fitting.

Why have they summarized things this way?  Shaq is out-going.  He loves to party and dance in public.  He is fond of drinking with his buddies.  He makes friends easily as he moves from one team to another.  He is a popular guy with his teammates.  People regard him as friendly, approachable, and fun loving.

Kobe is quite the opposite.  Kobe is known as an OCD worker.  He shoots hoops relentlessly in an effort to achieve perfection.  He has good health habits, isn't known for drinking, and sticks to a healthy diet.  He doesn't party much.  When invited to roll with hommies, he declines.  He keeps to himself.  He doesn't allow many people into his private world.  People regard Kobe as grim, serious, stand-offish , and aloof.

The descriptions people have given of these two look like they come straight out of the pages of an astrology book.  You could drop these descriptions into any chapter on Virgo and Pisces and they would not even be identified as a foreign teaching.  These descriptions would be acknowledged as orthodox descriptions of the contrasts between Pisces and Virgo.

You might as well be describing me and my brother.  You might as well be describing me and my former business partner Johnny Z.

My brother is a musician in a traveling band.  He spends a lot of time in bars for this reason.  He loves to drink and party.  In fact, he has a problem with that.  He makes friends easily.  He has had many girlfriends.  He does not have a problem opening up to people.  People regard him as friendly, approachable and fun loving.  He is a Pisces.

Many people have accused me of OCD on various subjects in my life.  When obsessed with a subject, I relentlessly strive to get it right.  I am regarded as grim and serious by some.  Others regard me as a clown, but only when I am fucking with people more powerful than myself, sticking a finger in their eye, so to speak.  when invited to roll with the hommies, even Pisces hommies, I often decline.  I keep to myself.  I don't allow many people into my private world.  I have been regarded as stand-offish and aloof.  As you know, I have pretty good health habits.  I don't drink, and I keep to a strict diet... which I occasionally break with popcorn and Crunchabunchas.  I just happen to be a Virgo.

Still, there is tremendous dynamism here.  You know the dynamism that the Pittsburgh Steelers of the 1970s had.  You know the dynamism that Shaq and Kobe showed when they were together.  I know the dynamism that Johnny Z and I flashed on the L.A. software market for about 2 years.

You would never believe it possible when you see such contrasting styles and personalities, but there is enormous complementary qualities between these two types.  Further, there is a great deal of affection and closeness between these two types, although Virgo is not good at showing it.  There is a fine line between a Virgo and a Vulcan.  Just remember that.  It's all about calm, cool, collected, logical self-control.

I am sure Kobe takes exception to being called aloof, just as surely as I do.  I am sure he wonders why people are offended by simple desire for privacy and time to work at his craft.  Further, I know he is suspicious of the motives of people who approach him, just as I am.  We worry about what you want and what you are after.  We know that people don't always, or even usually, have the best intentions.  They usually want something when they approach you, and it might not be good for you.  We know there is no reason to worry, as long as we keep everybody at arms length.

I am sure Kobe has regrets about what happened, but he will never admit this in public.  I am sure he wished it might have continued, but circumstances arose that he considered intolerable, so he burned his bridges. Virgo is a little like Scorpio in one respect:  When we burn our bridges, we really burn 'em.  We never come back to revisit a past relationship we have discarded.  This doesn't mean we don't have regrets about it, or wonder if we--perhaps--made a mistake in burning that bridge.  Still, you never discuss such a thing in public.  You keep it private and internal.

Homage to the Virgo Women

It would appear that Virgo Sisterhood is far stronger than I originally presumed. It would appear that I under estimated them... severely. That statement comes from a September 2 Virgo.

For whatever combination of reasons, I have never really taken a hard look at my astrological home girls. I have had a strong tendency to discount any female I encountered who happened to be a Virgo.

Perhaps it because I actually do happen to have a Virgo sister (born on 9/10/1963)... Perhaps it is because the two of us have an aggression score of 650 Sirus 1.1... Perhaps it is because she really has been my nemesis in scores of years past... I don't know...

We are almost at the end of Virgo season. Tomorrow is officially the last day of Virgo season. Next comes Libra. As these past 30 days have rolled by, I have been more and more astonished by the names that have come up on the IMDB.com birthday list.

I already knew that most of classic dames of Hollywood's golden era were Virgo women. I already knew Lauren Bacall, Ingrid Berman, Greta Garbo, and Sophia Loren were all born around my birthday. I noticed this through the years.

I already knew about my birthday buddy, Salma Hayek. I knew about Shania Twain and Faith Hill, two of my all-time favorite women. I hesitate to mention this, but I already knew about two-time defending AVN performer of the year, Tori Black.

I did not know that any of the following women were Virgos:

• Angie Everhart
• Barbara Eden
• Claudia Schiffer
• Heather Thomas
• Jacqueline Bisset
• Rachel Ward
• Rachel Hunter
• Raquel Welch
• Rose McGowan
• Shannon Elizabeth

I'm not even naming all of the famous women whose photos I just posted.

Folks, is it just me, or does this list contain most of the biggest sex-symbols from the 1930s clear up to the 1980s? You have 50 years of the biggest names on the Virgo list. No wonder the Scorpio dudes rank Virgo women #1.

Before I continue with my opinion, you should know conjunction is a tricky thing in Astrology. It's an incredibly powerful aspect, and often ranked as the single most powerful aspect. Unfortunately, it is unpredictable. You may love them. You may hate them. It depends on how they strike you. If they remind you of everything you hate about yourself, you will certainly dislike the conjuncted ones. If you strongly identify with them, and have an intuitive understanding of the conjuncted one, you're going to love them.

As a Virgo, I usually disdain Virgo women. It's not easy for them to get me to react to them. I would have told you I was biased against them. I would have also told you I had few, if any, good Virgo scores. Upon further review, I find plenary evidence to overturn that call. It would appear that I am wrong on all counts.

It seems that I have been reacting to Virgo women all along. Barbara Eden, in particular, was my first childhood flame. When I was 5 or 6, I thought she was the ultimate woman. I wasn't the only one. All my buddies in school thought she was the ultimate woman also.

Later, during the 1970s, I thought Raquel Welch was the reigning goddess of women. I always thought Lauren Bacall and Ingrid Bergman were insanely gorgeous. I recall seeing Rachel Ward for the first time in 1981 when I saw Sharky's Machine with my dad. She blew my brains out. I didn't know what hit me.

I ran my scores versus all Virgos born between 1966 and 1994, and it would appear that there are far more good scores than err I thought before. Top Virgo was born on August 31, 1985. She just turned 26 years old, and she's got a madness-educing score of 390. There are many marvelous Virgo scores in 1985. 1987 features a top score of 304. 1980 has a score of 303. 1976 holds a top score of 280. I have a 275 versus women born on 9/21/1974.

It would appear that it is indeed theoretically possible for me to hook up with a fellow Virgo. I would have scoffed at that notion just 30 days ago. I am more compatible with my own than I would have originally suspected.

In any case, these past 30 days have forced me to re-evaluate my home-girls. I am not prepared to say that the girls of my clan are hotter than those of the Capricorn or Pisces clans. I am still very, very biased in favor of these two clans.

However, it seems that for every Capricorn like Eva Gardner, I can show you two Virgo women like Lauren Bacall and Ingrid Bergman. For every one Pisces super model like Cindy Crawford, I can show you two like Rachel Hunter and Angie Everhart. I am leaving Claudia Schiffer out of this.

This may be a function of our general numerical superiority. Virgo is one of the most common signs. We are born during the baby boom that happens at the end of every summer. However, you have to give our tribe it's due. We got a lot of good looking women (and men).

I wanna go on the record and say that God only made one perfect Virgo woman. That was Faith Hill. Shania Twain and Lauren Bacall came within micro-fractions of a nanometer of perfection, but they didn't quite make it.

A gallery of Virgo women