The Squirek Factor

When the Madden simulator is so good at predicting the outcomes of the games, why do we still bother to play them? Why risk life and limb playing this dangerous game when we can predetermine the outcomes?

'Tis a specious question, but I'll give you one good answer: The Squirek Factor. What is the Squirek Factor? Let me tell you about The Squirek Factor.

Near the end of the first half of play in Super Bowl 18, Raider defensive coordinator Charlie Sumner anticipated a screen pass to Joe Washington. Sumner inserted a little known special teams linebacker into his defense, and ordered him to run right at Joe Washington, expecting this screen pass. That fellow was Jack Squirek. Sure enough, it was the screen pass Sumner expected. Squirek intercepted the pass and Waltzed right into the endzone for a crushing touchdown.

Later, in post mortem, experts pointed to the Squirek touchdown as the moment that ended the competitive phase of Super Bowl 18. From that point on it was an ugly route, from which no honor could be salvaged. Squirek played a season or two more and was never heard from again. He now runs a successful janitor service in Cleveland.

Super Bowl 42 was the last time the Madden simulator got the outcome wrong. There was a huge Squirek Factor in that Super Bowl. Deep in the 4th quarter, with Giants trailing the Patriots by 4 points, an obscure special teams Wide Receiver named David Tyre was inserted into the lineup. It is a crucial 3rd down situation. Eli Manning, running for his life from several Patriot defenders who seemed to have him cornered a split second ago, unleashes a long high-arc shot at Tyre. The pass is ugly and overthrown. David Tyre leaps about as high as I've ever seen a wide receiver go and makes a sensational catch. He does so with 10 time Pro Bowler and future Hall of Famer Rodney Harrison slapping the living shit out of him. Plaxico Burris would catch the game winning TD pass a few plays later.

By the close of the game, we all realized that Tyre's catch was the decisive moment in the game. Tyre made the catch that sunk the undefeated Patriot's dynasty. It is commonly considered the greatest catch in Super Bowl history. Tyre's catch was selected by ESPN's Chris Berman as the biggest single play of the decade of the 2000s. Rodney Harrison would later say, on an NBC broadcast, that he had had 6 surgeries due to damage taken in football. Nothing ever hurt him as much as David Tyre's catch.

Tyre played a couple more years for the Giants, doing little, and suffering several injuries. He was released by the Giants at the beginning of 2009. His catch was a massive example of the Squirek Factor.

Anytime a totally unknown player makes a crucial or decisive play which pivots the outcome of the game, and then disappears into the fog of history, we describe that play as an example of the Spuirek Factor. Everybody expects Peyton Manning or Drew Brees, or Dwight Freeney, or Darrin Sharper to make a decisive play in Super Bowl 44.

What if a totally unknown 3rd string offensive guard gets inserted into the punt return team for the Colts deep in the 4th quarter? What happens if this guy is not blocked, gets a free run at the punter, blocks the kick and waltzes into the endzone with the football? That could be absolutely decisive. That would be an example of the Squirek Factor.

What if a totally unknown 3rd string corner gets insert into the Saints defense with just 31 seconds left, only because of injury? What happens if Manning over-looks him because he is an unknown dude? What if said corner intercepts Manning on what should be the game winning drive? That would be a massive example of the Squirek Factor.

The Squirek Factor is the X Factor. It is the unknown and the unpredictable variable in the flow of events. It is the one bit of chaos space in an otherwise predictable world. It is the moment when unknown bench warmers get into the Super Bowl and do something sensational which alters the game.

This does happen from time to time.

There are three things we cannot predict in SB44. We can't predict who gets the Football first. We can't predict who will hold the football last. We can't predict whether there will be a Spuirek Factor or what that might be. These three things could still pivot the outcome of the game.