Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Are you ready for the biggest Heavy Metal band in the history of the known universe?


Three Dallas Cowboy offensive linemen have formed a band called Free Reign. They just got signed. The album will be released this fall on Australia's Riot Entertainment Label.


The three Cowboys are:
  1. Leonard Davis: Quite possibly the biggest SOB on God's earth. He stands 6'6" and weighs 354 pounds at last count.
  2. Marc Colombo: Also a very large SOB. He's 6'8" and a paltry 315 pounds.
  3. Cory Proctor: He is the peewee of the group, He stands a mere 6'4" and is a flyweight at 297 pounds.
The guys in Slayer will shit themselves when they see these guys coming. I would hate to see Colombo next to Ronnie James Dio. These guys could easily make Motley Crue eat their own assholes.

How good are these guys? I listened to a couple of excerpts of their music published on their MySpace website, and they very not bad. I need to listen to some more to be sure, but at this moment, they get more than a passing grade.

Incidentally, I know what I am talking about. I have been a Heavy Metal fan since 1980 and the AC/DC Back In Black album. Yes, I remember when it was absolutely brand new stuff. I now have a collection of Metal/Industrial/Hard Rock which tips the scales at 330GB. That is 330 Gigabytes. That is not a misprint. I own the moral equivalent of the library of congress of Heavy Metal. I cannot stuff all my music into my 160GB iPod classic. I am quite pissed. We are long overdue for a 320GB unit, and I want it now.

Anyhow, Free Reign will be joining my collection soon.