Saturday, September 12, 2009

At the risk of sounding redundant: All the Patriots who ain't there anymore

So, yesterday the NFL decided to run the tape of Super Bowl 36 again as a Super Bowl classic. Naturally, as a Ram fan, I am seriously annoyed by this. There is a temptation to watch the great Rams of the past, men who are no longer with us, all lined up and doing their their thing.

However, it was a day that will live in infamy. It was the second largest upset of all time in Super Bowl history according to Las Vegas. It wrecked my team's turn to become a recognized dynasty. Rather, we just remained a recognized offense. This was a terrible thing. Fuck you all on the east coast. May you eat shit and die. Yep, I am bitter as hell about it.

So, this was about the 23rd time the NFL has replayed the tape of Super Bowl 36. Frankly, it wasn't that great of game. Scoring was limited. Fouls were many. Errors were plentiful. Outside of the Super Bowl significance, the game wasn't that good. The Patriot defense did play lights-out football. Aside from the 'thrill' of a last second field goal upset, the game just wasn't that well played.

So why show this film for the 23rd time if you are the NFL Network? I want to resist the paranoid conclusion that Rich Eisen reads my blog, and wants to torment me for officially busting one of the NFL's chosen hype lines of 2009. I believe they showed the film because it was 9/11 and Super Bowl 36 was the official Super Bowl of 9/11.

I would like to take this opportunity to officially crack-down on one of the NFL's chosen hype line: The Patriots are going to be a force in 2009. Nope. You are just absolutely and completely wrong about that. I have stunning & devastating photographic evidence to present in this case. These are absolute empirical facts that cannot be denied, refuted or contradicted. When I finish making my case, you too will agree that there is absolutely objective reason to believe that the Patriot dynasty is officially over. You will also agree that those who advocate the Patriot's case are entirely fucked up.

A moment ago, I mentioned all of the Rams who no longer with us. I knew the Patriots were loosing blood before watching this game film again last night, but I didn't realize just how much blood they have lost until I saw the opening moments where they covered the opening lineups.

I want to show you the photos of all the key Patriot players who are no longer with the team. Just look at these photos and meditate for one moment. You will realize that the Madison Avenue hype line is absolute and complete bullshit. I am talking about 100% pure unadulterated bullshit. The Patriots are rebuilding. Do you hear me Rich, Marshall, Jamie?