Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Billy Devaney's publicity stunt?


I was a nose tackle in high school and junior college. As such, you may be surprised to hear me harp on the offensive line as much as do, but you shouldn't.

My experiance in football was pretty damn simple. It can be sumarized as follows. When our opponents had a weak offensive line, I and my brothers ran rough-shot over the other team. They had no chance for victory and we knew it immediately. We didn't just beat them, we murdered them. It was easy. It was truly like a feeding frenzy in shark infested waters.

When the other JC had two or three outstanding offensive linemen, young men being recruited by PAC-10 teams, they usually won. My experiance during such games was entirely different. I remember some brutal battles, a lot of physical pain, exhausion, more than one injury, and needing to lie down dead for about 24 hours after the game.

The game of football is won and lost in the trenches. If you win the battle at the line of scrimage, you win. If you loose the battle at the line of scrimage, you loose. It's just as simple as that. As Warren Sapp says, the most valuable Real Estate on Planet Earth is that one little yard in front of the football. Winning that one little yard each snap makes all the difference in the world to your outcome.

It is the hallmark of rooty-poot football team to ignore it's need for offensive linemen. Tutti-fruity executive-leadership would prefer to spend money on splashy PR moves like signing glamorous quarterbacks and running backs. Why waste money on unglamorous big uglies? The organization can get more PR, sell more jerseys and tickets doing the glamor thing. Why do the ugly unglamorous thing?

Because guys like me will utterly kill your prettyboys, that's why. Your splashy PR move will be a very temporary thing indeed if when my brothers and I come to town.

It is the hallmark of a rooty-poot team to select quarterbacks high in the 1st round, and repeatedly go bust due to deeply intrenched organizational cancers.

Cancers? What cancers? How about this one: The tendency to pull an $80 million dollar publicity stunt selecting Sam Bradford and not secure that investment with $2 or $3 million spent on acquiring Alan Faneca. That's a good one. I would call that a fuck up.

To make the principle more general I would formulate it this way: Any organization that makes the big and splashy move on the quarterback without building a massive offensie line is a rooty-poot organization.

Think about how many times the Bengals have gone bust. Jack Tompson, David Klingler, Akili Smith. Now they are working on Carson Palmer. Granted, the Bengals are a good team right now, but this is a recent phenomenon. This has been a bad football team over the years.

Think about the Lions. Chuck Long, Andre Ware, Joey Harrington. Now they are working on Matt Stafford. The filthy bastards are digging the poor kid an early grave. This is a rooty-poot organization that cannot seem to understand the importance of the offensive line.

Consider the Cardinals. Kelly Stouffer, Timm Rosenbach, and now Matt Leinart. These may all be busts, or Matt Leinart may yet make it in this league. We will have to see. One thing cannot be denied, thought: they signed Alan Faneca. Now we have neither Alan Faneca blocking for us, nor Ndamukong Suh to challenge Faneca. We could have had them both working our trenches.

Consider the Colts. Art Schlichter, John Elway (they couldn't even sign him), and Jeff George. Now they are workin on Peyton Manning. That is 3 QBs selected at the absolute #1 position before they finally hit upon one. Granted, the Colts are now the model organization. This is the doing of Bill Polian. You already know what I think of Bill Polian. He's the best executive in the history of the league. Before Polian, the Colts were dogshit for more than 20 years.

Frankly, a week or two after the draft, I am still in a state of shock that Devaney would ignore the risk-tables and draft:
1. A junior quarterback
2. With a history of injuries
3. Who hasn't played in some 18 months
4. Who stood with his arms folded at the combine while Tebow ran his ass off.
5. Pay him $80 million
6. Draft just one tackle (2nd round) to help protect our new quarterback
7. Draft only a single 4th round receiver to help him

And expect success. I personally believe our offensive line is no where near ready for this big splashy move of selecting a QB #1. So great are the odds against success that it baffles the mind.

This brings me to my worst fear. What if Devaney does not expect success from such a high-risk venture? What if Devaney is doing this to simply turn around the Rams' foundering economic fortunes for the near term? What if this is not a football motivated move at all, but rather a entertainment spectacle PR stunt?


Come now, the thought must have crossed your mind? Have you noted how complicit the NFL Network is in featuring the Rams now that we have selected Bradford? Have you noticed that they pay little or no attention to Detroit's selection of Ndamukong Suh? The NFL Marketing department desperately wanted Devaney to do this. Now with a face for the franchise, the marketing department can go to work.

One thing is certain: Devaney is either a genius or he is a crazy high-stakes gambler drunken on board a river boat casino. It's either going to work or it's going to go down in flames.

I can tell you this: If it had been my $80 million, and if I had the line the Rams have, I would selected the most robust, fastest, most durable, most healthy QB in the draft. Of course, that is Tim Tebow. He would not have cost $80 million either.