So when can we expect Ocho Cinco and Solomon Wilcots to bust each other up?

So, one of the best features of the off season this year has been watching Chad Johnson doing a little boxing training here in Los Angeles. As always, he is more fun than a barrel full of monkeys. By far, the most entertaining element within this entertaining saga has been Chad's warnings to Solomon Wilcots that he would like nothing better than to strap on the boxing gloves and show Solomon a thing or two. Solomon says he's going to take the little shaver down to the woodshed and sharpen him up with a leather strap.

I love it. Stop talking shit, both of you. I want a solid date, time and location so I can sell tickets to the event. I want to see to some real fighting also! No bullshitting, damn you! As Matt Millen says, always remember Raider rule #1, cheating is encouraged. As the late Gene Upshaw said, if you're not cheating, you're not trying. Despite the gloves, I want to see a Nightrain Closeline and at least 3 body slams.

All of this reminds me of my days at Edison High School in Fresno California. Icky (shuffle) Woods would play that game with Darnell Tatum. We used to joke that Darnell Tatum was the bastard son of Jack Tatum. (Oakland was only 168 miles away, but the time frame would not have worked out.) Darnell played Middle Linebacker. He played a lot like Jack Tatum. Of course, Icky was our fullback.

These two were always good for a practice fight. Icky wanted to run Darnell over. Darnell did everything necessary to ensure this wouldn't happen. Icky knew he would be an NFL superstar someday. He told us this many times. He didn't think any paltry High School Linebacker (Darnell) should even be able to smell his farts as he blew into the secondary. Of course, Darnell bitterly resented being taken so lightly. He planned to be an NFL superstar also.

Icky and Darnell would challenge each other to 101 fights per week. They would talk endless amounts of shit. The only problem was that the fight was all talk and no shock. They rarely swung a fist in anger. Truth be told, I never actually saw any fists flying in a public or private setting.

Somewhere around the end of our sophomore seasons, I think we all figured out that these two really had no intention of ever slugging it out. The both profited greatly from the illusion of a rivalry. Everybody in the school thought they were big tough nasty guys. Not the sort of fellows you would want to mess with. They gained a lot of prestige from this shit talk.

It was like pro wrestling, but without the wrestling. I have a suspicion that this is what Ocho Cinco and Solomon Wilcots are up to right now. This is good press for both of them. They both could use the notoriety.

Anyhow, I want to go on the record here and now: You can have all the notoriety you want out this deal, but you can't cheat us out of the fight. If you think you can talk shit and not settle it, you got another thing coming! We want to see you two bastards slug it out in a fight to the finish. Texas Death Match in the Steel Cage. One man lives. One man dies. Or maybe both die... That can happen.