Bad things gentlemen, bad things...

I just finished a couple of conversation with several of my coworkers. Bad politics are afoot at work. Bad sexual politics, it would appear.

Ever had the feeling that you are coming to the end of a run with a company? Things have run their course and the firm is going in a direction you just don't want to go with them? I've been having an assortment of feelings like that for about 6 months now.

I could spell it all out in a great deal of detail, but this would be unwise, especially when it is largely unnecessary to my future plans.

Sometime between 7/2/2011 and 7/8/2011 I should reach my target weight of 230 pounds. At that time, it will be possible for me to put on a nice looking custom-tailored suit, and tuck a nice alligator bag under my shoulder. With my hair nicely styled and moused in place, I should be able to win a political beauty contest.

Make no mistake folks, sexual politics are involved in both hiring and promotion decisions. They may be suppressed to the level of subconscious mind--or maybe not--but sexual politics are always there. To knock-down a nice new job with a nice new promotion, you better have your sexual charisma working for you.

Few companies are run by altruistic Virgos who wish to make decisions on a purely logical and optimal basis, setting aside all unnecessaries. Many companies are owned by lusty lovers of life who wish to grip it an rip it. They do allow their passions and personal preferences to interfere with their decision making. The lust of the flesh, the passion of the heart, the desire of the eyes have a great deal of power in Corporate America.

I recently heard Rich Eisen say that he would select Blaine Gabbert because he is "dreamy". I don't think Eisen himself would dream of Gabbert, but I know a shrewed owner like Sonny Werblin would take this into consideration. Werblin would use that in his marketing plan, were he alive today. He sure as hell did with Joe Namath. You are a fool if you think 3 or 4 NFL marketing departments haven't run projections on potential earnings from the girl market if they select Gabbert in this draft.

This may be one reason Mike Shanahan is currently jiggling his connections with John Elway and Pat Bowlen in an attempt to acquire the #2 pick and select Blaine Gabbert. But then again, Mike is a Virgo. He should make logical an optimal decisions.

But I digress...

Firms hiring programmers aren't always happy to select the super-genius who owns just two T-Shirts... both replete with boogers. No, they would like a guy who is articulate and well polished, a dude they can set before a potential customer or client; a guy who will impress the MBAs with his demeanor.

Of course, such a life change will probably mean that I can no longer wear one of my 62 NFL jerseys each day, and every day in a seemingly endless rotation... Alas, we cannot have everything in life. You take the good with the bad in life. If I want a nice promotion in safe harbor I will have to accept the downside of more professional dress.

Knowing this, I would be a fool to make a premature move. I need to stay the course till the weight loss program has hit target goals. At this point, a launch window will open, and I should be able to find safe harbor somewhere else. With the right Cancer or Capricorn in the boss's seat, I am bound to impress. Cancer and Capricorn bosses usually (but not always) love me. The feeling is usually mutual.

I guess the real question is this: just how far am I willing to move to secure that safe harbor? Would I be willing to leave Los Angeles? Would I be willing to move to San Francisco? Would I be willing to blow out of California altogether and move to a place like Phoenix, Los Vegas or Austin?

I have family members in San Francisco, and Miami. I have always fancied Miami. Maybe I should give it some serious thought.

Pixar's Up is a very sad and painful movie

I saw Pixar's "Up" on Monday night. I saw it in 3d on the DLP screen at the AMC16 in Woodland Hills. I did not write about it immediately because I wanted to give it a bit of time to digest in my gut and gestate in my mind.

After several days of consideration, I am largely in agreement with the critics. It is another Pixar classic. However, it is not my favorite. It is certainly not as good or entertaining as Wall-e and The Incredibles. The Incredibles was the most fun I ever had watching a movie. Wall-e was an unexpected scifi masterpiece, and also a weepy sentimental romance between two robots. I loved both aspects of Wall-e. This could be the most unlikely combo of affects since the original Blade.

I should mention, in passing, that if you had told me before I saw Blade that I would love a move about a black vampire, biker, Samurai, martial artist, who killed bad vampires... I would have told you you were crazy. That is the most unlikely combo of affects ever to work in the history of film.

But I digress. Back to the subject of Up.

Up is a movie about a nice, shy, somewhat grumpy old man whose dearly beloved wife has died. He was a shy and nerdy kid. He had the good fortune to meet his soul mate early in life and live long number of years with her. But now she is dead, and he is grief struck.

Carl Fredricksen is driven by grief throughout the course of this movie. Everything he does in the first half of the movie is motivated by grief. He bitterly regrets not doing all the things he and his beloved wife Ellie always wanted to do during their lives. He regrets that she died with wishes unfulfilled. He regrets that they died without children. It's wrenching as he reads through her childhood diary titled "Stuff I am going to do" and he knows she never did it.

As a result of this... and a little something else. He launches his airborne house on an adventure to Paradise Falls, South America. This phase of movie follows a pretty crazy acid-trip, dream logic. This clashes with the first 10-15 minutes which are realistic montage. Like most, I believe this opening 10-15 minute sequence is the most powerful portion of this movie. It is pretty close to flawless, and pretty overwhelming.

The remainder of the movie is less perfect. Along the way we run into dogs who talk with the aid of computerized collar, dogs who fly biplanes, dogs who cook and serve human diners, etc. This is not unprecedented for a cartoon, but it feels weird in the context of this motion picture.

Ultimately, on this road-trip, Fredricksen is letting go of the past, and embracing the future. He dies to the past, and is reborn to the future. Like a snake who must shed his skin and harden a new one, Fredricksen has to cast off the trappings of his former life so he can construct a new life without Ellie. It is happy and good that he succeeds. It is painful to watch along the way.

On the way a childhood hero is unmasked as a bad guy, Carl usurps control of the hero's mantel, he lets go of the house he lived in with Ellie for all those years, planting it where he said he would at Paradise Fallse South America.

So, how do I rate it? It's an A- effort. Its good. Damn good. But ultimately, it is too sad to be much fun. They front load the pain too. You get the "Dumbo's mom in jail" scene pretty early in this film. I don't know about you, but this one hit me like a ton of bricks... Real unexpected like. From that moment forward, the shadow of death and grief overhangs every second of this film. It is not until the very end that you are sure Mr Fredricksen has made the transition to a new stage of life.

Mr. Fredricksen is one of the lucky ones. Most old men die within a month of their wives, if the wife goes first. That says a lot about men. If you know that much, you know what kind of pain this shy old man is going through.

Many critics commented that this is Pixar's funniest comedy. I have to take issue with that statement. I deny that. I didn't find it very funny at all. The audience cackled with laughter throughout. I found it surprising--if not untoward--that they would laugh so freely given the extremely somber theme and tone set by the first 10-15 minutes. Perhaps they did not comprehend the theme of this movie. That is common, and happens often enough.

I found the situations humorous at best. At best, I laughed out loud twice. Mostly when Doug achieved victory over Alpha.

Ultimately I would rate this movie no higher than 4th place on my list of favorite Pixar movies. The Incredible still beats out Wall-e by a quarter-point. Ratatouille takes 3rd place. Then we can talk about Up.

I saw the movie in 3d, meaning I wore the glasses throughout the film. I saw very little pop out of the screen at me. As is always the case, 3d is not well exploited here. Don't bother. See it in 2d.