2011 NFL Season, Week 15 Results

Week 15... a week that will live in infamy.  A week of disgusting upsets.  Consequently, I had my worst week of the year at 7-8.  A loosing record for Christ's sake!  This never happens to me!  If it is any consolation, the dudes at ESPN didn't fare much better than I did.

I guess you can argue that the meek inherited the league (for one week) but now we must suffer all manner of rubbish discourse about whether the Chargers are actually the strongest team in the AFC.  We also have to suffer the remonstrations of Patriot bleeders who think the great pretenders of 2011 are the strongest team in the AFC.  'Taint so.

I want to make two things perfectly clear:

1. No learned, responsible, knowledgeable evaluator of the NFL expected the Chargers to be a powerhouse this season.  [Don't wave Michael Irvin around either; he was just being loyal to his old coach.]  Why?  Because they are not a powerhouse in 2011.  They have not been a powerhouse this season.  They've been chumps for the most part.  This is because of the odious actions of their GM A.J. Smith and their weak coaching staff.
2. The Patriots are dead meat in the playoffs.  I'm talking about a quick and easy out in the first round again.  They are going to be in and out like a pinche vato.  The Patriots are the great pretenders of the NFL.  You wanna crown their ass?  Then crown them, but they are who I think they are.  That's why their opponents should take the damn field.

I'm disgusted.

My brother from another mother, Kurt Warner, laid the jinx down on Green Bay during NFL Game Day Morning Edition on the NFL Network.  "The only way this team drops a game is if they all have that proverbial one-bad-game; the game where everyone comes out flat", said Warner.  He was a prophet and didn't know it.  The Packers came out and did precisely that, losing to a team they had absolutely no business losing too.

Pop the corks in Miami.  You remain the only undefeated team in the modern history of the league.  I am disappointed for the Pack.  I thought they would do it.  One loss won't stop them from going back-to-back, tho.

I don't know which was worse, the Patriots up-ending my Broncos, or the Chargers laying a once-in-a-blue-moon beat-down on the Ravens.  Don't read anything into it, art critics.  This performance is never again to be repeated.  Stick a fork in the Chargers, they are now done for the season.

At the end of the day, the Ravens will be the AFC Champs.  Broncos versus Ravens in Baltimore for the AFC title.

The two games you have to watch this weekend

Cincinnati vs Minnesota

I was stunned by what I saw on NFC matchup this morning: Sharp was stunned when Baldinger picked the Bengals. Sharp questioned him very closely on this one. Frankly I am stunned that he is stunned. I question how Sterling can question that pick.

Nobody mentioned the 10 ton elephant in the room: E.J. Henderson, the Vikings All-Pro Middle Linebacker just got killed by friendly fire. He will not be in the lineup this weekend, or for the rest of the year. Given this fact, I don't see how you can favor the Vikings. When I saw Henderson go down against the Cardinals, my first thought was: "They are going to get killed next week against the Bengals."

The Bengals are perhaps the most aggressive running team in the NFL. The stats say it is the New York Jets. I will tell you the Bengals do it better. They have nasty offensive line, and they fire the ball right up the middle with Cedric Benson, Larry Johnson, and former Ram fulback Brian Leonard. If you think they are going to miss an opportunity to run where they like to run, right where E.J Henderson isn't, you are absolutely crazy.

Call me foolish. Call me irresponsible. Call me a dreamer. I just don't like the thought of a mediocre defense, without its all-pro Mike Linebacker, trying to stop the Bengals running game. This is the most dangerous match the Vikings will face before the playoffs. I think it is a game they are unlikely to win. If you think the 49ers gave them some troubles...

There remains an irrational and unjustifiable level of exuberance & optimism around the Vikings and their chances for a Super Bowl birth. We need to remember that the Saints are the only undefeated team in the NFC. The Vikings just had their asses handed to them by those sneaky Cardinals. In the process, the Vikings suffered some major carnage. The sneaky Cardinals are once again poised to upset in the NFC tournament. They are more talented than the Vikings, especially on defense, and especially now. The matchups between the Saints and the Vikings, don't favor the Vikings.

In all seriousness, both of these teams could end up in the Super Bowl, theoretically. However, I would tell you that the Bengals have a much better shot than the Vikings. I say that based on the Colt's lamentable history of early exits in the playoffs. If the Colts get waylaid, the Bengals can go all the way.

San Diego vs Dallas

I don't know what to say about this one. You have two teams with opposite records in December. Dallas just came off a fluky loss (two plays turned that game towards NY) and the Chargers are riding a hot streak. Both teams badly need a victory to stay ahead in their divisions. Both teams are playing extremely well.

These are argubaly your two most tallented teams in the league. A few years ago, during their 14-2 2006 season, the Chargers put 12 men in the Pro Bowl. A few years ago, during their 2007 season, the Cowboys topped that with 13 in the Pro Bowl. This is the biggest contest on the board, and it should be exciting as hell.

I would tell you that this is a pick'em game based on the breaks, ref calls, and the bounces. If I have to pick one, I'll take the Cowboys because I believe the Chargers defense is still suspect.

The 2009 Vikings are the 2008 Browns

Last year the big buzz was about the Cleveland Browns. The Browns were the high fashion pick to win the AFC, if not the Super Bowl. They did not make it to the playoffs. They did not challenge the Steelers. The Steelers won the Super Bowl. Romeo Crenell got fired.

The Cowboys & Patriots were the favorites to meet in the Super Bowl according to most. Nope, neither one of them made it into the playoffs. Nobody favored the Steelers and Cardinals. If you had picked the Cardinals... I shutter to think of the consiquences of picking the Cardinals in the pre season of 2008. It would have been ugly.

The Colts and the Chargers were all supposed to be favorites as well. The Chargers had the worst record of any team to win its division. They upset the Colts who went 12-4, but were forced to take the wildcard route through the playoffs.

There is a lesson here: All forms of predictability have broken down. You cannot predict next years results based on last year. The continuity and consistency of teams has been irreparably compromised and destroyed by free agency. Whereas you could count on 6 to 10 years from a good unit in the years of indentured servitude. You can't count on anything now.

Now in 2009 everybody is buzzing about the Vikings. Mike Mayock, my most trusted advisor on the subject of talent, and normally the most reliable guy in the world, is also swept up in this mania. To be perfectly frank, he may even be the primary party responsible for it.

Well, I just want to go on the record here and say I don't believe it. Those who say that the team is loaded have a lot of explaining to do. The way I see it, the Vikings are team with only one legit superstar player. We all know that is Adrian Peterson. They have a modestly talented defense that does a hell of a lot with scheme and discipline. This is good, but remember: they are only modestly talented on defense. Jarred Allen may be the most modestly talented guy on this modestly talented defense, but he is no hall of famer. I do not believe they are a quarterback away from the Super Bowl. I do not believe Brett Farve is the last piece in the puzzle. I believe Brett Farve is beat to hell and utterly exhausted. I believe they have a better chance with the two QBs they have. To be frank, I suspect the Packers will be the team to beat in the NFC North.

Other teams I don't believe in

Patriots:

You know, once upon a time in the year 1980, I watched the two time defending Super Bowl champs, The Steelers, lose two tough games on Monday Night Football. They lost a big one to the next champs, the Raiders. They lost another big one to the San Diego Super Chargers. They finished 10-6. The Oilers 11-5, and the Browns 12-4 went to the playoffs. The Steelers stayed home for Christmas. I knew that was the end of the line for the Steelers. I was never concerned about them for the rest of 1980s. I just knew that was the end. I was right too. It was all down hill from there. I was very confident that that was the end of the dynasty. Many of the Steeler hall-of-famers continued to play for years after that. Still, they never did well after 1980. Chuck Knoll coached for 10 more years.

When the Pats lost Super Bowl 42, I knew that was the end of the dynasty. People have been talking shit about them going undefeated and winning the Super Bowl since the moment the Commish handed the Lombardi Trophy to the New York Giants. Do you realize how stupid you sound? I want to go on the record and say that I don't believe it. Especially now that Brady has had reconstructive knee surgery. A couple guys named Elway and Marino had this surgery. It took them two seasons to get back to something like their normal form. Neither were quite the same. I know the Patroit Dynasty ended two Super Bowls ago. That was the end of the line. Stop talking empty vanities and bullshit. It's over.

The Eagles

Please, bitch! The strength of that team was the defense; the Johnson & Dawkins defense. Both are now gone. The Eagles have done nothing to repair the breach. I am expecting a pretty sizable defensive breakdown from the Eagles in 2009. This Eagle defense will finish no higher than 15th in the NFL, dropping at least 12 slots from 2008. It could be worse than that.

"Oh, but the offense is greatly upgraded!" Let's wait and see how Michael Westbrook's surgically repaired ankle is. He is the West Coast back in the West Coast offense. He is the balls of the offense. They are not the same without him, and he has often been injured. I heard somewhere that he has never turned in a full 16 game season. If Westbrook is healthy and turns in 16 games the offense will be substantially upgraded. If he is not, forget it. All they did was tread water. Even in the best case scenario, offense wins games and defense wins championships. Forget the Lombardi Trophy. The Giants are way ahead of the Eagles.