I got big balls

Pardon me whilst I gloat for a few moments.  I am having a very good day.  My team has unloaded Billy Devaney and we have the opportunity to replace him with Bill Polian.  That will terminate a whole bunch of dysfunction in our organization, if we can pull it off.

I am rising a loaf of pumpernickel bread in the kitchen, and...

Better still, I purchased a 70 pound Cap Kettlebell  and proceeded to worked out like a vicious beast at my gym this evening.  This was my drill list

1. Dumbell bench press
2. Halo
3. Swing
4. Turkish Get Up
5. Sumo Chin (facing the wall)
6. Clean and press

I benched with a pair of 70 pound dumbells.  The Gireviks are quite correct.  The 70 pound dumbell is a lot lighter than 70 pound kettlebell.  I would invite you to lift and see.   I used my 60 pounder in the Halo, Swing, and Sumo Chin.  I used the 70 pounder in the Swing and the Sumo Chin.  I can't halo with the 70 pounder just yet.  Soon!  Very soon!

More important than any of this was my success with the Turkish Get Up.  I was able to perform 5 good reps with each arm using the 20lb kettlebell for the first time.  For the very first time, I felt as if I was performing this exercise with good control and decent form.  I did not bang-up my knee caps, which is an important thing to a surgically repaired dude like me.

Best of all, my hands feel pretty decent.  My left feels normal, and my right is just a little numb.  I am pretty happy about that.

Furthermore, an unidentified female entered the crossfit gym, and just felt an overwhelming compulsion to man-handle one of my balls.  She grabbed the 60 and asked how much it weighed.  I told her 60.  She felt compelled to try swinging it, and she did a pretty good job for 6 or 7 reps.  I was impressed.

You know that is an extremely flirtatious thing to do.  She was trying to send the message that she was a good strength match for me.  We'll see.  I didn't feel a particular synastry reaction with this woman.

The Girevik broke his doctor's orders

So, after 4 days of doing little or nothing, I was going nuts with excess energy today.  I had to do something.  I was losing my mind and becoming depressed.

I got on my Elliptical Cross Trainer and busted 21 minutes for 324 kcal.  Numb hands and fingers did not stop me.  Before 5 minutes of rest elapsed, I got back on and busted another 15 minutes for 231 kcal.   This was was a nice round 555 kcal in 36 minutes of elliptical.

I didn't feel finished.  I jumped on the bike with intention of performing 10 minutes of cool-down cycling.  I did 18 minutes of meltdown cycling for another 184 kcal.  All-tolled, this was 54 minutes of exercises for 739.  This is an okay-level of production, but you know I did much more than that each day during the summer season.

After the Cowboy game, I was at loose ends again.  Way too much energy.  I decided to break medical orders and head to 24 Hour Fitness for a 5/3/1 workout.  I made one concession to medical expediency:  Rather than doing a barbell press, I used the Hammer Strength Decline Press machine.

I went big.  I went heavy.  I went hard.

1. 5 reps with 115 pounds on each side (45 + 45 +25)
2. 3 reps with 125 pounds on each side (45 + 45 + 35)
3. 2 reps with 135 pounds on each side (45 x 3)

According to the 5/3/1 pattern, I should have only done the final weight for 1 rep.  I went for two and got it.  I cycled through it all a second time, but I failed at stage 2, only getting 2 reps.  Incidentally, that final weight was at least 270 pounds, even if you give me no credit for the machine overhead.  This quantity would be 305 pounds in barbell terms.

It felt great to put three big wagon wheels on (each arm of) that machine and press it.  No NFLer would be impressed by that performance, but the dudes in the gym were.  I looked like a beast to these cats.  I guess I am a medium-size fish in a small pond.

It looks like the rest did me some good.  My strength seems to be increasing by leaps and bounds.  This is, in no small measure, the result of Kettlebell training.  For the moment, my fear of lost muscle mass is diminishing.  I am certainly not losing strength.  It's hard to loose muscle mass and not loose strength.  Conversely, it is difficult to gain strength without gaining new muscle mass.

The problem came after the pull-downs.  I finished my pull-down pyramid at 205 pounds.  I almost pulled that down twice.  Unfortunately, my right wrist feels a bit sprained and strained.  I think I done sprung it.  It was fine until I did the pull-downs.

Oh well, we'll see if I manage to sleep through the night, or if I have some problems with numbness.  A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.  That's what I always say.

The Girevik benched 235 tonight

I had a rather successful workout tonight.

I did the 5/3/1 pyramid on the bench 3 times, which is probably too much work. It's more than what was specified, for sure. I slapped a pair of 45 pound plates and a quartet of 25 pound plates on a 45 pound Olympic bar at the top of the pyramid. For the record that is 95+95+45 = 235. At the end of the first two pyramids I nailed 2 reps instead of one. On the final pyramid, I could do it only once.

I was tired. I didn't want to end up like Stafon Johnson. Next time, I will do more.

Naturally, this pales in comparison to the 39 x 225 that guys such as Barry Allen have performed in the past. Still, I think it ain't bad for a guy who (a) hasn't lifted in years, (b) maybe going in for shoulder surgery soon (c) just lost 145 pounds, a process that always makes you weak.

One very interesting side note: In his fantastic book and video Enter the Kettlebell, Pavel Tsatsouline provided some weight guidance for beginners with the Kettlebells. He used the bench press as a misguided guide to scaling you Kettlebell weight. His official statement was:

1. Most men should begin with a 16kg (35 pound) kettlebell
2. If you are a strong man, able to bench 200+ pounds, you may begin with a 20kg (43 pound) kettlebell.
3. Only exceptionally strong men, such as experienced powerlifters, should begin with a 24kg (53 pound) kettlebell.

Well, it just so happens that the 20kg kettlebells at the Woodland Hills Athletic club and my own 45 pound kettlebell are just now becoming manageable for me. I can swing 'em, I can halo them, I can row them (two of them), I can tea-cup squat with them. In fact, I can swing and teacup squat with a 24kg. I can't yet clean them or snatch a 20kg, but I am getting close to a clean-clean with the 20kg.

What a co-inky-dinky that 235 becomes manageable on the bench press at the same time that the 20kg kettlebell becomes manageable on a variety of exercises. Hummmm... kinda makes you wonder if Pavel Tsatsouline has a little expertise, now doesn't it?

This guy knows his stuff. I recommend his work.

The Girevik shall train according to Wendler's 5/3/1 system

The term Girevik is Russian for "Kettlebell-man" or a guy who trains with Kettlebells.  As I have so often mentioned in recent days, I am totally in love with Kettlebell training right now.  My hand is so numb I can hardly feel it, but I am getting used to it.

When we say strength, we mean Kettlebell.  When we say Kettlebell, we mean strength... comrade.

Nothing will get you heart rate higher than a good CrossFit kettlebell race for the most reps in a timed interval.  Unfortunately, there is a problem with this scheme.  It doesn't seem to me that this scheme will do much to drastically improve your raw strength.  As usual, this is not a one-stop solution.  It is a big part of the solution, but not the whole solution.

Enter Jim Wendler and the 5/3/1 training system.  Wendler's 5/3/1 system is the greatest system yet devised for increasing raw strength.  I know.  I've not yet finished two weeks of it, and my raw strength is returning by leaps and bounds.  Nothing else I've tried has had this effect.

What is the Wendler 5/3/1 training system?  What is this system all about?  In the simplest form, the system consists of the following edicts:

1. Do only the large compound body movements: Bench, Deadlift, Squat, Clean & Jerk, Snatch.
2. Do an exploratory operation to discover you maximum one-rep weight in each lift.  Prepare to be embarrassed.
3. You perform 5 reps with 70% of your max weight
4. You then perform 3 reps with 80% of your max weight
5. You then perform 1 rep with 90% of your max weight

There is much more too it than that.  I won't spoil his book by representing his 4 week scaling system.  This is the easiest and simplest teaser I can give you.  Buy the book.

How well is the teaser working for me?  Well, let me tell you about it.

Despite my recent shoulder injury, I cleaned and jerked a 100 pound barbell this evening for a single rep.  That was after doing one jerk and 5 presses with 80, and another jerk and 3 presses with 90.  This effort wasn't particularly hard either.  Next time, 110 is the single-rep target.

I was surprised.  Two weeks ago, I couldn't raise my right hand above my shoulder...  at all... with an empty hand.  One week ago, I couldn't put 40 over my head.

This isn't just recovery from injury either.  The same effect is being documented in my dead-lift.  Two weeks ago, 135 pounds put a little too much strain on my lower back and midsection for a single rep.  Today, I pulled 185 for a single rep.  I should have pulled it three times.  It was too easy.  Next time, 215 is my single-rep target.  I can tell that the bar is going to get real heavy real quick.

My strength is returning.  Right now I am pretty excited.  This is far and away the most exciting development since my weight loss terminated some 6 or 7 weeks ago.

Incidentally, my weight seems to be holding steady at 185.6 right now.  Ergo, a heavy-cream Mac-N-Cheese isn't hurting me much.  If anything I look a little too tallow and frail right now.  None of my new acquaintances can believe I was ever a fat guy.  They just don't see me that way.  They think I am kinda skinny.

I need to transition completely to a strength/muscle building program, complete with higher caloric intake.  You must eat, or you will become skinny and have no respect.